Why are Starbucks baristas so damn happy? I'm glad there are people in the world that are happy but at 8AM some of these girls are so damn chipper that I question whether Starbucks puts anti-depressants in the coffee so that the free coffee perk for employees ensures overly happy workers.
"Hi! How are you today!"
"Horrible, thanks for asking."
"Aww let's see if we can change that!"
Yes you can change that. Either give me some of your happy pills or get me the girl on her period upset over the breakup she went through last night and let her take my order. She's perfect for me at 8AM.
^^^YES! She's perfect!!!
I've even asked, "Do any of y'all ever have a bad day? I mean, I've been on Glassdoor so I know it's not the pay."
It was immediately met with nervous laughter and,
"What can I get started for you?"
Sometimes I notice when I'm serious people think I'm joking. It made me wonder more. It's like she was thinking,
"Shhh, the Mermaid is watching and listening!"
I love the Mermaid's coffee even though she's a ram's head upside down (stupid Satanists) but, damn. I'm wondering what I'm really putting into my body. Seriously though, I want to light some of these girls' cars on fire just so they can have a bad day every now and then like the rest of us.
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Thanks for reading,
-Baton Rouge Bandit
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