This week I would like to begin a process of changing the way I am currently living the word ‘physical’. I am already surprised at the amount of resistance I am feeling towards correcting my living of this word, because I have for my entire life, abused my physical body, the greater physical environment as the earth and ecosystem, and my immediate home environment, all for the sake of my self-interest, gain and desires.
What is the physical to me? It is the environment within which we live, which includes the earth, the plants and animals, my body and the atmosphere. The physical acts as one, as the dynamic systems of life that work together to support all of us here, just like our bodies support us every day to live. In this blog I will be focusing on my most direct physical support, which is my body. But I do see the other forms of physicality as the same, and to be regarded in the same way I regard my own body.
How have I been abusing the physical/my physical? I do it in so many ways, when I get stressed and anxious, I place strain on my body. When I overconsume to make myself apparently feel better to ease or cover up the stress and anxiety I create within myself. When I don’t get enough rest, don’t exercise enough or exercise too much, when I am inconsistent or inconsiderate with what I put in my body in terms of processed foods and high sugar content or too much meat or coffee.
This is just to name a few of the most apparent ways.
Then there is the abusive thoughts I have about my body. I can become frustrated with it when I don’t feel well, impatient when I am hungry or thirsty. I have judged its appearance in so many ways and on so many levels, and blamed it for not being good enough, and for making me feel bad about myself. I have felt deep dissatisfaction with the lack of perfection due to my body not being perfect in appearance, according to what I have defined as perfect. I have felt hatred towards certain imperfections or developments I have had throughout my life, wishing I were different and not in my own body, longing instead for the physical bodies I would see in the magazines and on television.
I have had an extremely conflictual relationship with the physical, and yet the physical has been an example for me of what it is to have and be the full potential of integrity and self-respect. My body has never given up on me, has supported me to the best of it’s ability, despite any abuse I have done unto it. It has functioned consistently and without fail even under the sometimes harsh conditions I have imposed upon it. In other words, my body has supported me unconditionally, has given me the opportunity to live, be here and explore life and my reality, and I have never really fully appreciated this.
This is why it is time I begin to redefine the way I live the word physical.
I would just like to add a note about physical activity, which is part of how I currently live the word ‘physical’. I very much enjoy physical activity, but there is conflict there as well. It is mostly about getting lots of exercise to avoid gaining weight, which also has to do with superficial layers of judgment based on appearance.
My redefinition starts here, as I was already going into physical reactions about writing this blog, but decided to start a living re-definition in the moment. I decided to stop fighting with the physical, with my body, how I relate to it, and how I interpret the way it feels. Just now, I began to embrace the resistance and the way resistance to writing feels within my body. The resistance was intense, but I decided to approach it gently, and to support my body with relaxation techniques and breathing, and I went
ahead and wrote.
This is how I would like to begin experimenting with redefining and living the word ‘physical’. I will push myself to be gentle with my body, in how I treat it physically, as well and in my mind. My red flags to remind me to stop, be gentle and embrace my physicality will be in moments when I catch myself judging my body, reacting in emotions or feeling to and towards my body, and going into blame and blaming my body for anything going on in my mind.
I will push myself to give as I have received, in being unconditional with my body, fully accepting and embracing it as it is right now, with any and all apparent flaws and imperfections. Living a relationship of mutual support, acceptance and also looking to grow and optimize together. I want my body to be able to depend on me the way I have been able to depend upon it.
My body is like a machine, there does not need to be an emotional connection there. I will push myself to treat my body with more consideration of the fact that it is a machine that requires consistent attention and maintenance to reach its utmost potential (and sometimes that means leaving it alone and giving it time or rest).
I will allow my body to take an equal ‘front seat’ in how I drive myself through my daily life. This means, I will begin to integrate the habit of referring to my body, basically like asking it what it needs or does not need. When I make choices that involve my physicality, to take that moment to scan my physical to see if there is any feedback for me to take into consideration.
Redefinition:
Starting with the dictionary definition:
Physical
of or relating to the body as opposed to the mind:
"a whole range of physical and mental challenges"of or relating to things perceived through the senses as opposed to the mind; tangible or concrete:
"pleasant physical environments"
Sounding the words:
P = Place
H = Home
Y = Why
I= I
C= See
Al = All
Physical: The Place that is my home, it is me, and that is Why I see all that is required to do and not do, to be and not be for myself, my physical as Me.
“Living the word ‘physical’ focuses on the actions I take based on the ‘seeing’ I use to determine how to best maintain this place I call home.”
What this definition opens up for me is the awareness that I am capable of (to ‘see all’ of me). In my physical body there are no secrets, it is my self-honesty because I know what I am doing, what is detrimental, what is supportive, so long as I take a moment to look and listen. It is my home, the place that houses everything that I am. It is my substance and I am completely responsible for it’s well-being. There is no room in this home for judgment or reactions or any such mind interference. Simply unconditional acceptance as my body ‘just IS’ – does not require validation or justification to exist. So for me, living the word ‘physical’ focuses on the actions I take based on the ‘seeing’ I use to determine how to best maintain this place I call home.
This means, when living the word physical I will take the necessary time and give the necessary attention to expand my awareness of this place that is my home while I am here, alive and living in the greater physical world. I cannot See All if I am busy and rushing in my mind. The physical exists in real time, breath by breath, and if and when I also slow down to the pace of the physical, I will also provide myself the opportunity to See All that I am, that I need to give as I have received.
To start discovering a new way to live, begin here: