Welcome to Beastly Tales. Each has a message, a moral. All are meant to have an element of humour. Naturally, any names included do not depict real folk but are included as part of the joke.
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(As with Beastly Banter Beastly Tales is written and illustrated by Richard Hersel.)
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Richard Hersel
BEASTLY TALES
THE ACROBAT
The daring young man on the flying trapeze,
Flew through the air with the greatest of ease,
Alvin was a famous trapeze artist of renown,
Always billed as top ticket when the circus was in town.
And so it was on the opening night,
The crowds applauding Alvin in full flight.
His partner, Sally Butterfingers, in her tight leotard
Somersaulted through the air with skant regard,
For trailing her beautiful long blond hair,
Behind her as she sailed through the air.
She had been using quality skin beauty cream,
And her skin remained greasy up in the air stream.
She swooped to perform a triple roll snatch,
Alvin reached out, in mid air quickly to catch,
Her slippery fingers from her beauty cream hands,
And the next thing he knows he rapidly lands
On the safety net far, far below,
Clutching at it with finger and toe.
And after he had tumbled right down,
The first thing he saw was Bozo the clown.
Now Alvin had no great fear of heights,
But circus clowns gave him super big frights.
He’d see them coming from far far away,
And he’d hurry inside to keep them at bay.
Now Sally was waiting high up on her trapeze,
High, high up above, cross bar behind knees.
“Alvin come back up quickly my dear”,
“Or you may develop a real phobic fear”,
“Of aerial suspension from great heights”,
“Horrifying dreams could well ruin your nights”,
Alvin crawled towards the edge of the net,
And then he had his biggest fright yet.
For as he timidly peeped over the edge,
He saw three clowns pulling a sledge,
Yes a sledge with yet even more clowns,
Some wearing Top Hats, some wearing crowns,
Alvin hastened to the Big Top pole,
From which the rope ladder did hang from the bole.
And in an instant he was up, up and away
From the terrifying troupe of clowns as they did yell, screech and bray,
Safely up in the heights of the Big Top,
Alvin, beside Sally, did finally stop.
“Sally, my dear, of clowns I hold fear”
“I really can’t help it, they make me feel queer”
“But up here it is only of you, I dream”,
“Though, may I ask you not to use hand cream”,
“Before we begin our spectacular show”
“Or, again, I’ll wind up falling far, far below”
“And whilst there’s no doubt that I’ve fallen for you”
“I don’t want to fall due to your hand goo!”
