Anxiety attacks, a weird place to be

Not really sure what to say about it.

It all started a few months ago seemingly out of the blue. I can't quite put my finger on why its happening, but I have been having crippling anxiety attacks.

I suppose talking about EVERYTHING would clear my head some.

Been on some pills for it, that made me very aggressive and drowsy, which is an extremely odd combination to have. Tiredly angry? IDK

So I slept a bunch on those things. I ended up going off of them because I decided exercise, relaxing, reading, and being active would be better than being on a pill that makes me angrily tired?

Lost about 27 lbs in total over a 2 month span, due to having stomach issues. Was on pills for that WHICH MADE IT WORSE.... Finally off pills and any antacids. Occasionally taking a Gas-X type pill because random bloating that I never had before in my life, seriously wtf is that? Just turning 36 randomly makes this happen to you? Can't wait until im 46.... ffs

Something new to me

I started listening to more music and genres I normally wouldn't listen to.

This is kinda lame, but I really like this song my brother showed me randomly, Bruno Mars - 24K Magic.

The dancing and lyrics are pretty laughable and not too serious. I always find the humble brag culture hilarious trolling. The vibe I get from Bruno Mars is kind of a Daft Punk + Michael Jackson thing. The sound is extremely smooth, which is what I always appreciated about Daft Punk.

I usually listen to stuff by bands like Falling Up/Kill Switch Engage/Disturbed/Electronica stuff

Is it under control? Not really

You will probably have noticed I am not really around much.

Still seem to have these kind of odd anxiety attacks, sometimes happening in my sleep which is scary. Waking up out of breath is a very odd feeling, but now that I have had it happen so many times it almost became normal. I am still going to Doctors to see what is going on with me, possibly nerve damage from something that happened to me when I was younger(my back nerve fires a lot in my spine). Maybe the stuff during my sleep isn't anxiety attacks it is more of a nerve damage problem or sleep apnea(could be because I have had issues with my esophagus).

Well that is it for today. Will play some Red Dead Redemption 2 and watch dragonball z stuff on youtube ;)

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