(ESP/ENG) Aprendiendo de los hijos./ Learning from children

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Buenos días hermosa comunidad Motherhood, Dios les bendiga en este día, muy especialmente a sus familias.

Good morning beautiful Motherhood community, God bless you on this day, especially your families.>

Hoy estoy especialmente agradecida de Dios porque me ha concedido un año más de vida, hoy cumplo 50 años, la mitad de un siglo, valoro cada instante de mi vida, tanto los buenos como los malos momentos. Pero sin duda mi motivo de gratitud más grande siempre seran mis hijos, mis experiencias de vida con ellos y todo el aprendizaje que he recibido de ellos.

Today I am especially grateful to God because he has granted me one more year of life, today I am 50 years old, half of a century, I value every moment of my life, both the good and the bad moments. But without a doubt my greatest reason for gratitude will always be my children, my life experiences with them and all the learning I have received from them.>

Recuerdan el texto biblico donde Jesús dice "En verdad os digo que si no os convertís y os hacéis como niños, no entraréis en el reino de los cielos"( Mateo 18:3). Recuerdan ese texto? Los niños son maravillosos, sencillos, humildes, no guardan el enojo para siempre, perdonan, saben amar. Son muchas las cosas que podemos aprender de las cualidades de los niños. En esa ocasión cuando Jesús dijo esas palabras los discípulos estaban discutiendo por quién seria el mayor entre ellos, Jesús dejo claro la enseñanza al tomar un niño y colocarlo entre ellos y decirles que tenian que ser como ese niño. Los textos siguientes permiten ver la referencia a la humildad que todos debemos tener. Hay uno de mis hijos que destaca en esta cualidad desde niño, es un pedacito de cielo en la tierra, espiritualmente hablando desde pequeño me ha dado grandes enseñanzas de humildad. Es mi segundo hijo, Jensson, quien al igual que sus hermanos he mencionado en otras publicaciones.

Remember the biblical text where Jesus says "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven" (Matthew 18:3). Do you remember that text? Children are wonderful, simple, humble, they do not keep their anger forever, they forgive, they know how to love. There are many things we can learn from the qualities of children. On that occasion when Jesus said these words the disciples were arguing about who would be the greatest among them, Jesus made the teaching clear by taking a child and placing him among them and telling them that they had to be like that child. The following texts allow us to see the reference to the humility that we all should have. There is one of my sons who has stood out in this quality since he was a child, he is a little piece of heaven on earth, spiritually speaking since he was a little boy he has given me great teachings of humility. He is my second son, Jensson, who like his brothers I have mentioned in other publications.>

Cada hijo es único, diferente, especial, nuestro amor es por igual para todos, pero así como en otros post he destacado la profundidad de pensamientos de mi hijo mayor Fabian o la alegría con sus amigos de mi hijo menor Jairo y su destreza en el dibujo, deseo hoy destacar la nobleza, bondad, humildad y servicio de mi segundo hijo Jensson, quien desde pequeño me ha hecho recordar esas palabras de Jesús con su ejemplo. Comenzando desde que nació era diferente con el, su temperamento era distinto, su llorar apacible,recurria a el enseguida sabiendo que algo tenia porque casi no lloraba. Se despertaba y se quedaba quieto en la cama y cuando me daba cuenta ya se habia vuelto a dormir sin demandar atención. Mi hijo mayor no fue así, su llorar era fuerte, también lo atendia rápido, porque ellos nos necesitan, pero Jensson me mostró otra forma. En su crecimiento siempre fue amoroso, jugueton y travieso, pero habia una cualidad, era muy servicial y humilde( aún lo es). Su hermanito mayor, con su inteligencia se aprovechaba de eso. Ellos tienen de diferencia en edad solo 1 año y 9 meses, siempre eran mejores amigos.

Each child is unique, different, special, our love is the same for all, but just as in other posts I have highlighted the depth of thoughts of my oldest son Fabian or the joy with his friends of my youngest son Jairo and his drawing skills, today I want to highlight the nobility, kindness, humility and service of my second son Jensson, who since childhood has reminded me of those words of Jesus with his example. Starting from the moment he was born, his temperament was different, his crying was peaceful, I would go to him right away knowing that he had something because he hardly cried at all. He would wake up and stay still in bed and by the time I realized it, he had already gone back to sleep without demanding attention. My older son was not like that, his crying was strong, I also took care of him quickly, because they need us, but Jensson showed me another way. Growing up he was always loving, playful and mischievous, but there was one quality, he was very helpful and humble (still is). His older brother, with his intelligence, took advantage of that. They are only 1 year and 9 months apart in age, they were always best friends.>

Por ejemplo si yo les daba una galleta a cada uno, cuando iba el mayor tenia 2 y el ninguna. Cuando yo regañaba al mayor el se molestaba conmigo y me decia cosas como " Yo se la di, si Fa es feliz yo soy feliz". Fa es el diminutivo de Fabián, asi le deciamos. Si por ejemplo miraban tv y el estaba sentado más cerca, al rato veia que el cedia su lugar al mayor, le preguntaba qué pasó y me decía yo veo bien de aquí, mejor Fa allí. Poco a poco fuí mejorando esas cosas, conversando y con firmeza, porque ambos tenian que ser igual y tener los mismos privilegios y siempre lo veía a el ceder. Humilde en extremo, hasta en el colegio, para ayudar a otros. Siempre arrancaba una flor frente a la escuela para entregarla a su maestra. Una vez lo cambié de colegio por un niño con problemas familiares que era muy agresivo y le molestaba mucho e incitaba a los demás a pegar, le pegaron, la directora no queria lo cambiara, lo queria mucho, pero ví la necesidad, porque el era incapaz de defenderse. Cuando mi esposo le decia que se defendiera el decia que el no queria que su maestra y los demás pensaran que el era malo "que va a pensar la maestra", decia. El cambio le favoreció, hizo buenos amigos y también aprendió un poco a como enfrentar el bullying en los colegios.

For example, if I gave them each a cookie, when the oldest had 2 and he had none, he would get upset with me and say things like "I gave him, if Fa is happy I am happy". When I scolded the older one he would get upset with me and say things like "I gave it to him, if Fa is happy I am happy". Fa is short for Fabian, that's what we called him. For example, if they were watching TV and he was sitting closer, after a while I would see him give his place to the older one, I would ask him what happened and he would tell me "I see well from here, better Fa there". Little by little I was improving those things, conversing and with firmness, because both had to be equal and have the same privileges and I always saw him give in. Humble in the extreme, even at school, to help others. He would always pluck a flower in front of the school to give to his teacher. Once I changed him from school because of a child with family problems who was very aggressive and bothered him a lot and incited others to hit him, they hit him, the director did not want to change him, she loved him very much, but I saw the need, because he was unable to defend himself. When my husband told him to defend himself, he said that he did not want his teacher and the others to think he was bad, "what will the teacher think", he said. The change worked in his favor, he made good friends and also learned a little about how to deal with bullying in schools.>

Mis otros dos hijos fueron distintos en esto, nunca buscaron pleitos o problemas a otros niños, nunca me llamaron porque se hubiesen peleado, pero ellos si me contaron que lo hicieron para defenderse en determinados momentos de abusos. Algunos niños muestran mucha agresividad en los colegios por conductas aprendidas en casa, muchos antivalores, por ejemplo mi hijo Fabián se peleó en la escuela y cuando llegué a buscarlo me dijo la maestra - yo no le dije nada a Fabián, lo dejé pelear, porque hasta yo estaba cansada ya, Fabián se defendió, después lo separé-. Me quedé sorprendida por lo que me dijo la maestra. Por lo general los problemas de conducta de los niños tienen su origen en el hogar, los niños son nobles por naturaleza, les falta ayuda en su formación. Jensson conoció un niño en primer año que era muy grosero, decia muchas palabras obscenas, era su forma de defenderse en el colegio, agresivo en sus respuestas. Puedo decir que Jensson ha sido una muy buena influencia para el, su amistad contribuyó a mejorar las notas y forma de ser de ese chico que ahora siempre es un visitante habitual de la casa y muy buen muchacho, cortéz.

My other two children were different in this, they never looked for fights or problems with other children, they never called me because they had a fight, but they told me that they did it to defend themselves in certain moments of abuse. Some children show a lot of aggressiveness at school because of behaviors learned at home, many anti-values, for example my son Fabian fought at school and when I came to pick him up the teacher told me - I did not say anything to Fabian, I let him fight, because even I was tired already, Fabian defended himself, then I separated him-. I was surprised by what the teacher told me. In general, children's behavior problems have their origin at home, children are noble by nature, they lack help in their upbringing. Jensson knew a boy in the first grade who was very rude, said a lot of obscene words, it was his way of defending himself in school, aggressive in his responses. I can say that Jensson has been a very good influence on him, his friendship contributed to improve the grades and way of being of that boy who is now always a regular visitor to the house and a very good boy, polite.>

Una vez de niño Jensson me dijo " mamá, yo seria feliz, si todas las personas fueran felices". Es un ángel en nuestras vida, su hermano mayor Fabian lo respeta mucho, por como es el. Es más en algunos momentos, ya grandes, adolescentes, cuando tenía algún problema con Fabián, era suficiente cuando Jensson intervenia y decia " Fa, mamá tiene razón, por esto y esto...". Asunto arreglado, mi hijo mayor cedia o entendía mi punto. Otras veces me decía a mi " mamá, entiende a Fa, el piensa que...". Y yo también entendía su punto, porque ninguno somos perfectos y también nos equivocamos. Trataba entonces de llegar de otra manera. Igualmente, el fue muchas veces mediador entre sus hermanos, el mayor y el menor Jairo. Recuerdo su hermosa carita de niño cuando me decia " Fa y Jairo están discutiendo, no te preocupes mamá yo hablaré con ellos". Yo lo escuchaba cuando hablaba y me reia, su forma de el ayudar y hacerlos razonar, su vocecita. Luego venia y me decia "no quieren entender, anda tu". Pequeño, hacia esas cosas, yo intervenia y solucionaba todo, pero apreciaba la bondad de Jensson y su inteligencia emocional. A veces tenia exito en sus intervenciones, actualmente sus hermanos valoran mucho su opinión.

Once when I was a child Jensson told me "Mom, I would be happy if all people were happy". He is an angel in our lives, his older brother Fabian respects him a lot, because of the way he is. In fact, in some moments, now grown up, teenagers, when I had a problem with Fabian, it was enough when Jensson intervened and said "Fa, mom is right, because of this and this...". Matter settled, my older son would either concede or understand my point. Other times he would say to me, "Mom, understand Fa, he thinks that...". And I also understood his point, because none of us are perfect and we also make mistakes. So I tried to reach out in another way. Likewise, he was many times a mediator between his brothers, the older and the younger Jairo. I remember his beautiful little face as a child when he would tell me "Fa and Jairo are arguing, don't worry mom, I will talk to them". I would listen to him when he spoke and laugh, his way of helping and making them reason, his little voice. Then he would come to me and say "they don't want to understand, you go ahead". As a little boy, he would do those things, I would step in and solve everything, but I appreciated Jensson's kindness and his emotional intelligence. Sometimes he was successful in his interventions, nowadays his interventions, nowadays his siblings value his opinion very much.>

Es mi hijo más servicial, el que se transnocha conmigo agarrando agua porque no me quiere dejar sola, el que está más al pendiente de la comida del gato, de cerrar las puertas, de acompañar a sus hermanos, de si algo se me olvida. Se que como madre siempre hay algo que mejorar y sigo aprendiendo en cada etapa, pero también siento que algo habré hecho bien cuando veo la bondad y nobleza de mis hijos, especialmente Jensson. Cada hijo es distinto, tenemos como padres que apreciar y amar esas diferencias, destancando sus cualidades, resaltando lo bueno, estimulando lo positivo, formando en valores y contribuyendo a su desarrollo armonioso.

He is my most helpful son, the one who stays up all night with me getting water because he doesn't want to leave me alone, the one who is more aware of the cat's food, of closing the doors, of accompanying his siblings, of if I forget something. I know that as a mother there is always something to improve and I keep learning at every stage, but I also feel that I must have done something right when I see the kindness and nobility of my children, especially Jensson. Each child is different, as parents we have to appreciate and love those differences, emphasizing their qualities, highlighting the good, stimulating the positive, forming in values and contributing to their harmonious development.>

Dios les bendiga grandemente, sea su dirección y guia en la crianza de sus amados hijos. Seamos más como ellos, humildes, sencillos, nobles, tenemos mucho que aprender de los niños.

God bless you greatly, be your direction and guide in the upbringing of your beloved children. Let us be more like them, humble, simple, noble, we have much to learn from children.>