Thinking a lot lately about aging... how much of it one accepts as part of the natural process, and how much of it is mindset combined with all the micro choices made day after day. Noticing how aloneness is affecting me, partly due to the pandemic and partly being an introvert living in a rural area. Social opportunities are intentional (vs. random encounters) except during forays into town: errands and such.
Today I went in to pick up bags of leaves for use as mulch on my gardens. Met a nice man who happened to be black, which is unusual where I live. I wondered what it must be like for him and his family, being here. This is a community where I'd expect them to encounter a fair amount of prejudice. As much as I wanted to express care for what it might be like for them here, I was reticent to bring that up in a casual conversation. So, as usual, I simply expressed casual interest and a neighborly, warm welcome and went on my way.
Also today I took part in (yet another!) online meeting. It was a newly formed group, so there was some awkwardness, including some difficulty with language due to participants being from various regions of the world. I am hopeful that the group will grow toward one another with time.
I think about how different it is to meet virtually vs. physically. It feels like there is a void in my life currently, a yearning for more face time and physical presence. At the same time I wonder if the real disconnect isn't within myself. I've been spending more time than usual on the computer lately. Trying to learn about crypto, and exploring dapps. This requires a lot of new procedures and unknowns. And I'm seventy years "old" wondering how much flexibility I have for learning new things. How much perspective can one maintain on slow changes in capacity??? Realizing how differently a person of twenty-five might experience this Hive space vs. someone like me with a different history, and aging reflexes...
Just some rather random thoughts from the day. Making an intention to get outside and work in my garden before going down the rabbit hole of the internet, hoping to be better grounded.
Thanks for reading this. I invite your reflections.
