Let me guess, you quickly clicked on this post like some morbidly curious mad dog with saliva dripping from it's mouth, hoping to get so much as a good laugh on here - yes?... Well NO! Sorry to disappoint you, but this is going to be a very serious post.

And I mean very very serious. Like , VERY VERY VERYYY serious - no jokes whatsoever °_°

From @galenkp 's #weekend-engagement topics, I choose:

You can be one of the following things this weekend( a video pornstar). What do you choose to be and why? Explain your answer in at least 400 words.

Oh, how perfectly quaint! His weekend engagement just so happens to coincide with my sudden career change to the Adult Film industry.

Now, I know what you're thinking: "Why?... Why porn???" Well, I can certainly tell you that it's not for the attractive payment of $1500 per scene for adult male superstars, or for the rush of having sex with some random person on camera; or even for sheer pleasure and desire of knowing that because of one of my bathroom scenes, somebody somewhere in the world is having a little too much fun with themselves :) - No! Actually, in reality, it would be because of one thing and one thing only:

No nut November °_°

Now, if by some chance you're too young, too old, or just a Mormon to know what the above phrase means then, take a look:

No nut November is an internet challenge revolving around abstinence from sex, masturbation, and ejaculation ( or colloquially "to nut") during the month of November.

_[Wikipedia](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/No_Nut_November)

And now, for your viewing pleasure, here are some memes:

_{Meme Source}

Yeah so, much like the Day 13 guy, I found myself constantly failing the challenge! And with no other reasonable solutions(that worked for me) to my disposal, I sort to seek the next best thing - becoming a Pornstar!

Yes, yes... I know how crazy that sounds but, hear me out for a sec: think about it, if I became a licensed pornstar now, it'll mean that i'd be completely free from all the confinements, torments, and madness of the challenge! How you ask? Well, say one of the guys suddenly hit me up,

Yo it's November! Ready for the challenge man?

There wouldn't be any need to panic because, I'd already have the perfect excuse !

Ah nah... Sorry man. I can't! I'm a pornstar remember? Gotta work on Novembers too 😅

( ͡눈 ͜ʖ ͡눈)

Now be wary, becoming a porn actor (especially if you wanna take it mainstream) isn't gonna be as easy as you might think. You're actually gonna have to put in a lot of work! Heck, before you can even consider filming, you've gotta go through some important guidelines - something I like to call Porn 101.

_{Image made with Canva}

• Step 1 : Check your self before you wreck yourself — First things first, get naked and take a good long look in the mirror! Your appearance is gonna be the most important factor in determining whether or not you have a shot in this industry anyway.
  Then, after taking that good LONG look, ask yourself: "If I was the viewer, would I really pay to see my body get banged like a nail???" If you're answer is "no" or a mere "meh", then you my friend, are in the risky zone and will have a hard chance getting in. However, if you're answer is a good "yes" or solid "most likely", then you're in the safe zone and will have a much better or fairer chance in getting into the industry.

_{Important Note for guys: If you happen to find yourself in the risky zone, you could always compensate for it in another way :)... I know you know what I mean, don't make me burst out the eggplant 👀...}

• Step 2: Cumface — Now as silly as this may sound, this is actually a very important concept to secure in your checklist. The heart and soul of every good porn movie, is the quality of the actor/actress's Cumface! Once more, burst out those mirrors, fake an orgasm (or don't, to get better results 🙃), and if you don't end up looking like you just swallowed a whole gallon of lemon juice, then... You're good to go to Step 3!

• Step 3: Enhance — Now, this is one of the most important steps, especially for those in the risky zone, say it with me: "ENHANCE ENHANCE ENHANCE!!!" If you have big boobs, MAKE EM BIGGER, if you have a huge personality, PRACTICE KICKBOXING, if you like doggy, ROLEPLAY AS DOG FOR A WHOLE MONTH; I don't care what or how you do it, just make everything bigger Bigger and MORE ATTRACTIVE! The industry eats that kinda shit up!

_{Note for guy: Unless you like prostate cancer or worse, forget the willy enlargement pills and stretching exercises k?}

• Step 4: Be prepared for the Darkness to come — Understand that venturing into a career like this isn't gonna come without consequences; everyday, for the rest of your life, you would be met with constant criticisms; the world will forever look upon you as an object of sex and shame; your friends and families would most likely abandon you; the sheer pressure you will feel from both the industry and people around you, would make you go absolutely insane; day by day, you would find yourself constantly questioning your life actions, contemplating whether or not you had made the right choice afterall; and even when the coercion of society finally brings you down to the ultimate brink of madness and despair, forcing you to get on your knees and beg for a way out — it would've already been too late... 😈

But hey, don't let me scare you hehe😅. If you're cool with the above, then proceed to the final step - step 5!

• Step 5: Get started with an Agency — Just like any other film industry, porn requires you to be active with an agency for present and future work opportunities. I recommend you try Brazzers first; they're very big and reputable and have the largest signings of porn actors/actresses.
  Clean up nice, take your resume with you, be prepared for an impromptu anal scene, and when you get to that audition... I'd be there waiting in the lobby with you :)

Conclusion

A choice of career in the Adult film industry, is a unique one indeed. Undoubtedly, it can be quite thrilling and sexually captivating but also, and just like any other job, it can be pretty hectic and burn you out pretty quickly; but most importantly, i'd say it's not everyone!