Hi everyone, my name is Onukem Zainab Purity. Emphasis on Zainab because that's what all this will be about.
The first time someone I had known for a long time asked me, “Wait, you are not a Muslim?” I was confused but everything about me says “NOT A MUSLIM"
And it wasn't the last time I had to explain I am not a Muslim because of my Muslim name and sometimes it's just tiring. Stereotypes like this may seem small, but they shape how we’re treated — in conversations, in opportunities, in friendships.
My mom has northern origins and my dad is South-south, Ikwerre. Zainab was given to me by my maternal granddad, and I liked the name, so I decided to go by it.
One time, I had a debate with my mum on whether names were tied to religion or language. My mom won in the end but till now I still have my doubts.
In one of my posts, I mentioned how in secondary school, I was the best in agriculture in my class. And in school back then in SS2, when they appointed prefects, for the agricultural prefect post, it was always given to the best male and female students in agricultural science for the set.
You would have guessed the rest of the story by now.
Our set had the most messed-up prefect appointment in the history of that school.
Normally my name was meant to be submitted by my teacher to the principal to approve the post as I was the best. But he took one look at the name Zainab and said, “She is not a Christian," and skipped over my name and submitted the next girl's name, no questions or anything.
It wasn't that much of a big deal, though, because I didn't like their religious selective system, but still, he didn't even bother to ask or anything.
And this is someone who I was his best student for years.
The funny thing is that when he found out, he asked me the same question I have heard so many times, “Wait, you are not a Muslim?”
Another crazy thing is that I have had friends before who thought: her name is Zainab, she must be a Muslim, just to find out I wasn't and distance themselves from me. I have received known and unknown judgment, side eyes, just because of the expectations others have of me based on my name, and how I should live my life.
It's also crazy how we now live in a “modern world" full of assumptions. Back then it used to bother me so much, but now? I don't care, it's something I can't stop so I just ignore it. People can think and believe whatever they choose to. But, one thing I am never going to do is carry the weight of people's expectations.
Today, I wear my name boldly. It connects to my roots, my story, and my unique path — not a box someone else wants to place me in.
