I imagine that you have heard the phrase "we lack empathy" ... And yes, that term that is very trite lately, which we are all talking about but few of us know how to practice it properly; however, let's talk about it here.
First thing's first,
What is empathy?
It is said that it is a cognitive, affective and emotional ability in which a person is able to put himself in the emotional situation of the other.
However,
Up to what point?
I have always considered myself an empathic person, but until less than a year ago, I realized that my concept was wrong.
For me, being empathic was putting myself so much in the emotional position of the other, to the point of accepting their opinion, agreeing on everything, doing whatever they wanted and sometimes even accepting simple abuse "because he / she was having a bad day or because of his desire to want to be master of reason ".
Many times I found myself in situations in which I always put in value the position of the other person in front of mine, and boy did it bring me problems! Because when I turned around, I always felt bad, however, I justified myself that I could not say or do something because that person was going through this situation.
Today I am still an empathetic person, but now I know how to set my limits so as not to hurt myself emotionally.
I recently had an experience with this "false empathy" and it seemed convenient to say so. I think we have to stop normalizing that ...
They treat you badly because the other person is having a bad day, is going through a difficult situation or - insert their excuse-.
And that starts from understanding that every day each one of us wakes up with millions of situations that disturb us and the world definitely does not revolve around us.
So, the next time you have a bad day and want to unload with someone, remember that he may also be going through a complicated situation and your actions can exacerbate it, even lead him to situations in which his integrity is tempted.
Let's make it fashionable to understand others, connect emotionally and accompany without having to justify their bad actions..
