We are all familiar with the saying "raise crows and your eyes will be gouged out"; which wants to express to us that well-intentioned actions are sometimes rewarded with ingratitude, leaving everything related to gratitude in oblivion...
Now, this saying can be applied in the upbringing that parents give their children when they do not mark certain limits but allow their rules of life to be imposed.
When educating a child, many questions and doubts often arise. During the role, parents notice that they experience different when they must set their limits and it is common for some of them to come to feel that they are bad parents because if they determine very radical regulations, their children misinterpret these guidelines.
"Really, only parents master the art of misreducing their children." Enrique Jardiel Poncela
What is and is not to set limits for children?
Sometimes we believe that the word limit is only associated with something negative and in the case of parents, they think that if they apply it to their children, they would be overlooking the opinion or criteria that they may have. However, this terminology is far from ignoring their points of view since its purpose and of course application is to teach and regulate something in particular.
It is important to be clear that educating also implies saying NO to inappropriate requests that children may make. By using the word NO, parents also manage to correct the decisions that are being made, and in turn are consequential to them.
Because of this, it is important that parents know how to raise their voices and know how to get angry with their children when necessary. These actions can be done clearly and calmly since it is not convenient to issue threats that will not be executed at any time
Consequences of educating without setting limits
When children grow up without limits, they are generally people who have little tolerance for feelings of frustration. It is difficult for them to control their emotions and they do not act correctly when having to comply with obligations and regulations.
They tend to manipulate and make other people feel bad whose goal is to achieve a purpose that benefits only them.
The lack of limits can generate:
Lack of effort and perseverance.
Impertinences.
Privilege demands.
Little tolerance and patience.
Little collaboration.
Behavioral problems.
Physical assaults.
Destruction of objects.
If parents don't educate, who else can take on this role?
There are countless homes where we find stories that the child has the last word and adults automatically adjust to the whims, plans and routines that they may have...
Parents are the ones who have the role of educating their children. Not other people. This education involves teaching them what is and is not correct, listening to their concerns or needs, saying NO when necessary.
We know that educating is not an easy task but if parents do it with love, dedication and commitment, there will be guarantees that their children will be people with admirable values.
