Initially, I went right off into 'creative' mode fantasizing about creating a video of what my week is like set to 'Flight of the Bumble Bee' with some funny excerpts in-between like the other morning when I was hurrying through breakfast smoothies and left the 'super high power' button on. I found myself literally covered from head to toe in bright pink dragon fruit juice and all my planning for a perfectly timed morning was left splattered all over me and the walls. Goals?
I actually had the whole "Goals" video mapped out in my head and all the little distractions that happen in the course of a day and I would end it with 'love' really being my only goal. Of course, not being the highly controlled type A personality, I procrastinated my way through the week, one distraction after another ending up with nada! Yeah, sure....I like to live on the edge ;) Spontaneity is my middle name - I prefer living 'organically' - I like to draw outside of the lines....mmmmm hmmmm
Yeah, I'm a slacker. I mean, life is certainly busy with homeschooling, being a mama and zoo-keeper. But to be honest, I could definitely use some fine-tuning where 'goals' are concerned. Errrr
As I thought about this further and sat down to write, it occurred to me that there might be a reason that some are better than others at keeping and achieving goals.
I remember quite a few years ago, we invited some new friends to spend the weekend with us at the beach. My husband and I are not 'schedule' people - we are more fly by the seats of our pants, live and let live kind of people. This couple was NOT! LOL No, they were total type A personalities with 'extra credit' attached. I'm sure this situation was just as painful for them as it was for us (two days, just two days!). Everything was listed out and checked off with times and duration for them. Even fun! In the end, we ended up compromising the last day going our separate ways - they with their scheduled list and us with our open-ended day, meeting precisely at 4pm for dinner (which they prepared) and ghost crab hunting afterwards on the beach. It actually turned out to be a wonderful learning experience and really fun time together. The ghost crab hunting has remained a permanent tradition for us actually. (No crabs hurt - just walking on the beach at night with flashlights and thousands of scurrying ghost crabs glowing in the moonlight). For sure, we learn something from every situation and experience we have with people.
To me goal-setting is excruciating. Is there a reason for that or am I doomed?
Reflecting on the above experience, it occurred to me that perhaps this has to do with various personality types. For instance, introverts vs extroverts. Do introverts have a different perspective regarding goal setting compared to extroverts? I was curious, so I set out to answer that question.
As it turns out, YES, it does have to do with individuals and their personality types. We're all different and have different ways and methods of setting goals and following through.
It's been a long time since I've taken the Myers-Briggs personality type test but apparently its useful for determining how you set goals and ultimately how you can achieve them.
(under 3 minutes of your time)
---- > http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp
"When it comes to achieving your goals, your personality type may help or hinder you. It’s important for you to know where and how."
E – Extraversion: If you are energized by being around people and social settings, then you’re likely an extrovert. And you need to take the following into account when you’re setting goals.
For extroverts the process of goal setting is done the same way you do everything else – by talking through it. Goal setting for extroverts is usually a group experience. You need to think out loud, which can drive our introverted “I” counterparts crazy. (I’m an “E,” so I speak from personal experience on this one!) If you know this about yourself, enlist an accountability partner, coach, mentor, or a friend or two to have this discussion with you.
If you’re an “E,” it’s especially important to put your goals in writing. This will be really helpful if your executive or boss is an introvert because it gives him or her time to reflect and process the information before discussing it with you.
Make sure to practice your listening skills. This will help those around you give you some good feedback in the goal-setting process as well.
I – Introversion: If you are energized by calm settings and quiet time to reflect and think, then follow these tips during your goal-setting process.
For introverts, the process of goal setting is done in a more reflective manner. You need time to think about and reflect on your goals to the best stuff. Allow for this quiet reflection in your goal setting process.
If you’re an “I” who works with an “E” boss, make sure he or she understands you need this time to consider ideas for your performance goals. Just because you’ve talked about them doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve settled on them if you’re an “I.” Eliminate some frustration by making it clear that you’ll need to meet and finalize your goals once you’ve had that time to fully think through them.
S – Sensing: If you gather data and information in a more hands-on manner using your five senses and prefer the practical and realistic, then here’s what you need to consider when setting goals.
Sensors prefer goals that are simple and attainable. Practical, down-to-earth goals. Attainable means that there is enough challenge in the goal to inspire and motivate, but not so much challenge that it seems absurd.
Sensing people need to know what’s going to be accomplished with the goal before the goal is set. Then there must be some tangible evidence that the goal can be reached.
If you’re an “S,” don’t lose sight of the “big picture” by focusing on the details. Look at the whole puzzle, not just the individual pieces, and see how it all fits together.
N – iNtuition: If you gather data and information in a more theoretical manner and by trusting your gut instinct, then these will help you with your goal-setting process.
Those who use their intuition prefer to not bother with sensing. You want to look at the future in terms of your far-reaching impact. The nitty-gritty of goal setting often seems dull.
“Ns” need goals that are inspirational, challenging, and set within a conceptual framework. For “Ns,” there is no motivation or movement without inspiration, so goals need to be a broad based idea that will lift you to a higher level.
Intuitives do not want goals that are too simple or clear because they are considered to be obvious. And the obvious need not be planned – it will take care of itself in the mind of an intuitive. So the purpose of a goal is to go beyond what is already being done. Therefore, if a goal sounds a bit out of reach, it’s better to try for it even if you fail.
Intuitives have an ongoing quest to “dream the impossible dream.” But keep in mind, you still have to be able to attain the goal. Intuitives don’t always pay attention to the practical realities of their plans. So pay attention to this if you’re an “N.”
T – Thinking: If you approach decision making in an objective and firm-minded, problem-first-people-second manner, then this is what you need to consider when setting your goals.
For thinkers, a goal must be the result of an exhaustive thought process. Goals must reflect the “best there is.” So build this into your process. Don’t try to do it on the spot just to get it done — allow for the time to think.
“Ts” are driven by the what and how behind the goal. What is to be achieved? What good is to come from it? How will it fit into the rest of my life?
“Ts” can be committed to goals but not necessarily in agreement with them. You need to be aware of this so you don’t get caught off guard and agree to goals that you disagree with.
Don’t forget to consider the people side of the equation. Keep in mind, others may be affected by the goals you are proposing.
F – Feeling: If you approach decision making in a subjective, fair-hearted, people-first-problem-second manner, then this is what you need to know about your goal-setting process.
For feelers, goals must reflect a concern for others – not just themselves. Feelers want the most and sometimes the best for everyone. You need to be especially careful not to set goals that someone else wants you to set just because they will help him or the department. Your goals need to align with what you want and need, too.
Don’t take things personally. When your boss criticizes or critiques your goal or idea, don’t view it as a personal attack or think it’s the wrong goal. It’s OK for others to disagree with your goals.
J – Judging: If you approach the outside world around you in a structured, scheduled, and controlled manner, then your preference is probably judging. Don’t confuse this with being judgmental. They are not the same. If you’re a “J,” here’s what you need to do when setting your goals.
“Js” don’t need a formal process to set goals. It’s already a natural part of their life. Each day brings a new list of goals, including crossing everything off the list.
“Js” want goals explicitly defined so all involved can agree to them. Once that process is complete, it’s complete. Then it’s time to get on with tackling the goals.
If you’re a “J”, be willing to listen to alternatives. It’s easy to think you’re right, but there may be other views that you should also entertain. You need to set aside sufficient time in the goal-setting process to consider all the options before reaching a conclusion.
P – Perceiving: If you approach the outside world around you in a flexible, spontaneous, adaptive, inquisitive manner, then here are a few tips are for you as it pertains to the goal setting process:
Goal setting for perceivers is an unfolding process with different levels of agreement. Goals are always emerging. And while most perceivers would agree that you need goals to be successful, the goals are really only guidelines that are open to reevaluation at any given time.
Interestingly, a perceiver’s success rate is not significantly different from a judger’s. You are equally capable of reaching your goals — your methodology is just very different.
As a perceiver, you have to keep yourself from procrastinating. Enlist the accountability partner and review your goals on a regular basis. Also, give yourself a self-imposed deadline to think about new information. Then commit to making a decision instead of letting it linger and not setting your goals.
"The best goals in the world can go nowhere if they don’t appeal to your personality differences. Don’t try to force yourself to set goals the way your boss or manager does if that’s not who you are. Develop a process that works for you. Educate those around you about how you function best and enlist their support in the goal-setting process. If you do all these things, your goals will all have check marks next to them – and you can get on with setting new ones!"
Source
I am able to share the above information as long as I share this paragraph:
Julie Perrine, CAP-OM, is the founder and CEO of All Things Admin, providing training, mentoring and resources for administrative professionals worldwide. Julie applies her administrative expertise and passion for lifelong learning to serving as an enthusiastic mentor, speaker and author who educates admins around the world on how to be more effective every day. Learn more about Julie’s books — The Innovative Admin: Unleash the Power of Innovation in Your Administrative Career and The Organized Admin: Leverage Your Unique Organizing Style to Create Systems, Reduce Overwhelm, and Increase Productivity. And request your free copy of our special report “From Reactive to Proactive: Creating Your Strategic Administrative Career Plan” at www.AllThingsAdmin.com.
What's my prognosis for my whimsical distractions and dreamy detours?
I'm an INFJ - Introvert(16%) iNtuitive(41%) Feeling(28%) Judging(1%)
The bad news: It is one of the rarest of personality types and most complex! Of course it is! No wonder. Small goals are challenging to this type. Abstract thinking, dreaming, humanitarian, purpose and meaning are my motivators. Hmmmmm
I just about fell out of my chair laughing when I read this comment:
What I find interesting is that INFJ's are meant to be the rarest personality type found, with only 2% making up the general population. However the majority that have commented here are INFJ. So questions need to be asked....1} Are INFJ personality types drawn to take this test more than others? 2} Are INFJ's more likely than others to leave a comment? 3} How was the original observation of INFJ's being rare acquired?
Yes, we tend to get distracted by deep thought - analyzing the meaning and psychology of everything. And it's true, comparatively, this personality type filled up the comments like no other personality type trying to analyze 'even the number of comments' for this type. No wonder we are so distracted!
As far as informing people that I might 'function' a little differently than the majority of people (this was the advise given), that's not going to happen. But it sure does explain so much!
The good news: Writing, counseling, public service and even politics are areas where INFJs frequently find their niche.
In other words, meaning and purpose in goals are my motivation and anything else kinda bores me or gets lost in the fray. The small goals, I just do without writing lists and I am continually in a constant state of improvisation - flow.
Interestingly enough, the Myers-Briggs test I took entering college, didn't include all this detail (or maybe it did and I just zoned out) but it was the same result. In any case, I was given a list of potential career choices:
LOL! What do you think I chose? Speech Pathology...the clinical side of the spectrum. I was doing good...until the throat-boogers came into focus! "I can't do throat-boogers!" And with that my college experience became a 'dabble'. I dabbled and then ditched it - ending up completely off my trajectory of college goals. A drop out....ba...ba...ba
Had I went the 'teaching' route of helping children with impaired speech or brain injury/stroke victims - I might have stayed the course. Just a slight shift in thinking would have made a difference. This would have been more in-line with my personality type had I taken the time to know this.
It's all making sense now!
Am I doomed? No, it appears that we are all driven by different experiences in goal creation and function. In fact, learning what personality type you are and what drives your passions, is key to succeeding in achieving goals and for setting them...apparently.
This might as well be a continuation of my post "Re-Think Success" post as this topic is gracefully interlaced with 'what is your reason for being?'. Goals serve a purpose in taking those passions and putting them to action. Who knew!
Consider this a little detour into what your personality is drawn to and what it's challenges are. Some personalities have a harder time than others in different goal landscapes, some easier.
I would need to work on this in order to improve my goal setting habits as I fall into the 'procrastinator' category - putting lesser interesting and mundane goals lowest on my list. In fact, writing lists is low on my list, too! Which I think is pretty important in order to achieve these small goals! In truth, if I got these other goals off my list, it would probably take some of the peripheral stress off me in order to enjoy my more loftier goals and dreams. Right?
Okay, okay.....I concede!
This has been very enlightening for me. Not something that I set out appreciating, but I now see the 'importance' of improving this in my life. And interestingly enough, my husband also carries the same exact personality type which is even more amazing considering it's small percentage of the population. Hmmmmm I think we may need to enlist some help on this one ;)
It's counter intuitive, but the internet and those that specialize in goal setting, all agree that keeping your goals 'secret' will heighten your chances of achieving them. In fact, according Kurt Lewin, considered the father of social psychology, telling others about your goals is like telling your 'brain' that you've already done them, lessening the chances of achieving them.
However 'writing' them down has the opposite effect - it tells your brain that you are serious about this and sets into motion the process of achieving the goal. And when you are able to check those items off your list, your brain rewards you with a small amount of 'dopamine'! Hello! So, that's the secret behind those type A personalities that seem obsessed with list making....hmmmm
I found this video very, very helpful, inspirational and motivational. A little different than the typical goal setting instructional video (which normally agitate me because of their 'infomercial' type format). He uses a different method kind of like a story board (I do like stories!) so this appeals to my personality better. Maybe it will yours, too.
I have to say, this was a very enlightening journey for me through this topic. I was forced to really look at myself a little deeper and evaluate where I needed to reflect more and improve.
I hope you find it just as helpful. And I do hope you share your comments and thoughts - I always get a great deal of joy out of reading other perspectives and the discussions that happen.
And if there are any other INFJ's out there - WE NEED TO TALK! LOL
To read "Re-Think Success" here is the link: https://steemit.com/dropintheocean/@youhavewings/re-think-success
