I've been on pause for a couple of days before writing this,just because I was unsurer of what was gonna happen next.
Since when I was a kid, I always put sexual pun to everything
That's right, even in elementary school, I was probably like 10 when I started being a sexual pun jokes just to tease, but I was still innocent back then, so I never got any realistic results. Just a couple of Eww answers, nohing more.
Growing in the middle school, I became suddenly shy. I don't even remember the reason, just shy, but I always preferred female companions than talking with my male colleagues. They kept talking about hacking their scooters, soccer and stuff like that, I liked more hearing about gossips and what the girls wanted from life.
That doesn't means I'm gay, well, not totally at least. I will explain % later.
Go away shyness!
Shyness is something that was teasing me to be took away, at least for having a girlfriend. I took a couple of books about selfesteem, and learned from it.
I didn't became less shy, but at least I learned something useful for others.
I was became a selfesteem psychologist.You are right, after a couple of books you don't automatically become an expert of the subject, but believe me, at that time, when I was 13/18, it helped a lot when I had my real and internet friends. I setted my expertise of sefesteem to my customers, and after that I amplied it to use what I knew to gather more informations about who I liked.
At the start it was a very difficult, because I was exposing myself too hard, but then, with more soft approaches I found out it was way better.
Is that like social engineering?
I suppose so. I was probably the best in what I was doing, not to count that in that period I was practising just for fun missions on hackthissite, such good old time. Registered there in 2004, it was a good period for me. Young and stupid and wanting to have challenges. At the time, I wanted to become a programmer, just because of the sake of it, not for the money, not for popularity, but for being useful somehow. I still have some of my dirty experiments for helping people to win something at the lotto. Good times.
At some point I became a talkative machine
In that time I did from one opposite, from total shyness, to a notstop talking machine, seriously, I was annoying as hell.
I was sgetting psychologically tortured as school for this. let's move on.
Sex, this unknown thing I met only a couple of times until now.
With my experience, at the age of 18, I had my first real aka physical girlfriend. Worst experience ever, well, maybe not like the time I foundout a girl I liked on the internet, when it was the time to get physical she was more blasphemous than anybody I knew. That was a strong punch in my stomach.
I had sex only a couple of times until now, so I'm not the experienced guy it looks like I am, but still, I have "enough" experience to let the girl says I'm good in bed. Maybe I'm just natural with a gift,or it is just mother nature that after all these years made me gathered some natural expertise.
So, why are you so idiot?
Hey! I'm not so talkative anymore, I just... lose interest pretty fast, and keep changing my interests every 6 months. And that's bad for me, because I would love to keep on on an interest but bad feedbacks never pushed me to do better but made me angry and give up on that. This year I finally decided 3d modeling was one of my passion when I was 15, so I want to hunt this passion down and keep going.
Yeah, that's what it stops me ususally, bad feedbacks, or the complete absense of feedbacks, which usually, happens on here aswell, that's why I have had almost the need of powering down, but just a couple of true steemit friends gave me the braveness to hold them, so thank you 
