Hi!

How is life with parents who are old?

I was adopted and my parents were in their 40's when I came into their lives at the tender age of 1 month. I am now 26, my father passed away 6 years ago and my mother is 66.

My post is merely to understand and see if I can find any common issues arising with others who have had or are having a similar experience.

Having parents who are older is difficult. I'm not going to sugar coat my experience. Don't get me wrong, my life has been privileged and I am lucky to even be here. It's just that there is such a generation gap, such an age gap that 90% of things are lost in translation.

The views I have about life are different, I'm gay, although my mother supports me, she also is very narrow minded about it, so I feel like her support is like an empty box of promises.

I've always had the fear of losing my parents at an early age, Ive lost one, and its most likely that my mother wont make it to even see me getting married or having a kid ( if I decide). Sometimes I feel bad that I wont ever be able to give her what 'the majority' of parent always wants.

Also, I'm always feeling like I'm playing a game of catch up, like nothing I do can compare to the friends kids, who are by the way, in their 40's! I'm not settled, I dont earn enough.

I know this sounds like a lot but it's just the feelings I go through. It's like something that is always going to be there and I cant help it. I've never been able to open up and be myself. Not really. It's like I'd be someone they never expected me to be. Someone they wouldn't approve of.

At this moment in my life. I am 26, gay, living in a country where its illegal to be gay with parent who doesnt show me any love, not really. I was raised mostly by my nanny.

Anyway, this post has turned into an episode of Dr Phil but Im hoping people who have felt the same or similar things can contribute.