Mr Winkle was asleep, and Mr Tupman had had sufficient experience in such matters to know, that the moment he awoke, he would, in the ordinary course of nature, roll heavily to bed. He was undecided. ‘Fill your glass, and pass the wine,’ said the indefatigable visitor.

Mr Tupman did as he was requested; and the additional stimulus of the last glass settled his determination.

‘Winkle’s bed-room is inside mine,’ said Mr Tupman; ‘I couldn’t make him understand what I wanted, if I woke him now, but I know he has a dress suit, in a carpet bag; and supposing you wore it to the ball, and took it off when we returned, I could replace it without troubling him at all about the matter.’

‘Capital,’ said the stranger, ‘famous plan – damned odd situation – fourteen coats in the packing cases, and obliged to wear another man’s – very good notion, that – very.’

‘We must purchase our tickets,’ said Mr Tupman.

‘Not worth while splitting a guinea,’ said the stranger, ‘toss who shall pay for both – I call; you spin – first time – woman – woman – bewitching woman,’ and down came the sovereign, with the Dragon (called by courtesy a woman)¹⁶uppermost.

Mr Tupman rang the bell, purchased the tickets, and ordered chamber-candlesticks. In another quarter of an hour, the stranger was completely arrayed in a full suit of Mr Nathaniel Winkle’s.

‘It’s a new coat,’ said Mr Tupman, as the stranger surveyed himself with great complacency in a cheval glass. ‘The first that’s been made with our club button,’ – and he called his companion’s attention to the large gilt button which displayed a bust of Mr Pickwick in the centre, and the letters ‘P. C.’ on either side.¹⁷

‘P. C.’ said the stranger, – ‘Queer set out – old fellow’s likeness, and “P. C.” – What does P. C. stand for – Peculiar Coat, eh?’ Mr Tupman, with rising indignation, and great importance, explained the mystic device.

‘Rather short in the waist, an’t it?’ said the stranger, screwing himself round, to catch a glimpse in the glass of the waist buttons which were half way up his back. ‘Like a general postman’s coat – queer coats those – made by contract – no measuring – mysterious dispensations of Providence – all the short men get long coats – all the long men short ones.’ Running on in this way, Mr Tupman’s new companion adjusted his dress, or rather the dress of Mr Winkle; and, accompanied by Mr Tupman, ascended the staircase leading to the ball room.

‘What names, Sir?’ said the man at the door. Mr Tracy Tupman was stepping forward to announce his own titles, when the stranger prevented him.

‘No names at all,’ – and then he whispered Mr Tupman, ‘Names won’t do – not known – very good names in their way, but not great ones – capital names for a small party, but won’t make an impression in public assemblies – incog. the thing – Gentlemen from London – distinguished foreigners – anything.’ The door was thrown open; and Mr Tracy Tupman, and the stranger, entered the ball room.

It was a long room, with crimson-covered benches, and wax candles in glass chandeliers. The musicians were securely confined in an elevated den, and quadrilles were being systematically got through by two or three sets of dancers. Two card-tables were made up in the adjoining card-room, and two pair of old ladies, and a corresponding number of stout gentlemen, were executing whist therein.

The finale concluded, the dancers promenaded the room, and Mr Tupman and his companion stationed themselves in a corner, to observe the company.

‘Charming women,’ said Mr Tupman.

‘Wait a minute,’ said the stranger, ‘fun presently – nobs not come yet – queer place – Dock-yard people of upper rank don’t know Dock-yard people of lower rank – Dock-yard people of lower rank don’t know small gentry – small gentry don’t know tradespeople – Commissioner don’t know anybody.’

‘Who’s that little boy with the light hair and pink eyes, in a fancy dress?’ inquired Mr Tupman.

‘Hush, pray – pink eyes – fancy dress – little boy – nonsense – Ensign 97th – Honourable Wilmot Snipe – great family – Snipes – very.’

‘Sir Thomas Clubber, Lady Clubber, and the Miss Clubbers!’ shouted the man at the door in a stentorian voice. A great sensation was created throughout the room, by the entrance of a tall gentleman in a blue coat and bright buttons, a large lady in blue satin, and two young ladies on a similar scale, in fashionably-made dresses of the same hue.

The Panama Papers Video