May 23
Dear Ellie
I could not concentrate on study today, not at school nor at home. I felt sleepy and just had other things on my mind. Anne Frank for example! I haven't got over it yet. This book has impressed me so much! I kept thinking about it. I worry I might fall in love. Of course I don't fall in love and there is no one I like but there is someone I should watch out for. What would happen if I do fall for someone? I guess if I think about it nothing would happen. I just don't think I have ever been moved this much by the depiction of a romance. I think it is because when Anne kept her journal she did not know it would be published and she was completely honest. Really, she is so amazing in writing! And she was just about my age! When I finished the book after school today I was so sad! Towards the end of the book she wrote with such hope, with such confidence about the future! And she ended up dying just about 3 months before the end of the war. I don't like Germans now. I was also disappointed that there was so ending. I was expecting that she would get to kiss Peter before the end for the last time. Maybe something like that did happen but I wish there was a written record of it. There is something I thought about. Why do people close their eyes when they kiss? Don't think I could find an answer. I think I am similar to Anne in some way and we could have been friends.
May 24
Last night we called mum in Russia. She says that her eye hurts. I was not even thinking about it. I thought she didn't have pain anymore! I hope she feels better soon.
On the way from school Yuki said that there is a boy that stares at her like he is angry with her. She wants to be liked. And she was surprised that I don't get upset when I get bullied sometimes. I guess that really is one of my positive qualities. If you think about it, it is not really that important to be loved, especially by boys.
May 27
Dad took me out for lunch and to a video cassette rental shop. I chose two CDs and four videos. One of the videos is a movie called Melody and then another one - The Diary of Anne Frank! That got me so excited! I really want to describe my feelings but cannot describe them in words. I will first write about the movie itself.
The movie was really good. It was shot in 1959. I think Anne's dad (who survived the holocaust) assisted in the production. But I had some disappointments. In some parts the story had been changed. Especially I was upset about the bits with Peter. A lot was different. Like the part of them falling in love. It wasn't even very romantic, unlike the book! Even the part about the kiss! It was only barely covered. Although I thought that was almost the central theme! I felt very disappointed that it was not based on "my" book. Still, the overall impression I got was good, just like the book. I am finally calming down now but I felt so intense right after it! Hard to describe that state. Sad but at the same time good. How do you say 感動 in Russian? I want to write about this in English. But again, why on earth did not they follow the book? It would have been more interesting. Ah it's still good though. Why are there so few books and movies as amazing? Of course, perhaps I do not know much but I have at least heard a lot about adventure films but movies like this, that make you experience such amazing feelings - there are none. In the movie they say that their hiding place is now open as a museum and you can go in. I so want to go! It is hard to believe this is for real. Anne has become something incredible for me, almost magical. Such a pity that she died! And I thought just now that it would have been great if the other dwellers of the "Secret Annexe" had kept diaries too, especially Peter! Would have been so cool to compare them!
I am getting more certain again that keeping a journal is important. Not just for me, for all people on the planet! Now, in the future and... in the past. I am sure that a lot of people had lives like Anne's. Maybe even more interesting. But they haven't kept a diary. Sometimes people want to leave their name in history forever and don't know what to do for it. And sometimes all that is enough is a diary that you keep for 2 years. For example, people should remember and be impressed with Anne for at least another century! Wish I could encourage people to keep a journal. Not sure how. Ah I am still in this mood. I feel sad but inspired and awestruck at the same time. Wish there were more movies like this. It's a pity that I know this wouldn't last. Guess I will start with Yuki. I mean tell her how amazing journalling is.
