Hi Hananan! It's been a while since I see a post from you, I hope you will return to posting again, but I understand that you've been through a lot in life... Family break ups can be super hard :( I think you did the right thing, and I don't think you are an egoist. I am happy to hear that your mom seems to have gotten better since.

Like you, I think, there is no reason to remain in a toxic or hateful relationship. It is better to admit the truth and break things apart and though it may be harder for the short period of break-up, in the long run, I think it is better not to let resentment and grudge fester inside our hearts.

All my hugs to you, Hananan. Hope you will find a path back to creativity and to joy, in the future <3