We find the Twins at a gymnasium where Hehehe and Hahaha are tossing a fifty pound weight back and forth as easily as one might be playing catch with a ball.
Hehehe - What do you think of the upcoming tag team tournament, brother?
Hahaha - I don’t know. The tournament is being held at Wrestle: UK. I don’t know if I like it.
Hehehe - Does it matter where the tournament is being held? We get a chance to go for the WUK tag team titles if we win the tournament.
Hahaha - Donzig is there and you know what happens around Donzig.
The twins giggle in their ghastly way, but there’s something of a shudder too.
You see, the twins cannot die. No matter what you do to them, they will stand up in the end and thank you for the experience. This did not mean that Donzig didn’t try his best to put them down for good on more than one occasion.
Hehehe - You know that Donzig became the X*Crown champion some time ago?
Hahaha - Noooo! Really? Has everyone who might be good left the Network until only Donzig was left to be able to win the championship?
Hehehe - I blame Dylan Black and his retirement…
Hahaha - Come to think of it…I do too.
The twins throw the weight back and forth until a second fifty pound weight is thrown into the mix. Each of the twins throw one weight and catch one weight with a general ease. They are short. They are fat. They are stronger than what you would imagine. They keep going at a fairly slow pace until a third weight is thrown into the mix, making them have to go faster to keep up with the fact that at least one of the weights had to be in the air at all times.
Hehehe - Why doesn’t Jonnie Valentine step down from running Hardkore World and crush Donzig like a bug?
Hahaha - Why don’t you?
Hehehe - I couldn’t possibly step down from running Hardkore World. I don’t run it?
Hahaha - Oh, that’s right!
The two giggle in their disgusting way, sounding like they were also bringing up phlegm at the same time as laughing. They spit to the side, green globs going to the side while they continue to juggle the fifty-pound weights with ease.
Hehehe - Do you know what I would do if I were facing Donzig in the ring right now?
Hahaha - No. Do you know?
Hehehe - No. I was kind of hoping that you would know the answer.
Hahaha - Ohhh. That makes sense since I am the older brother.
Hehehe - By five minutes!
Hahaha - Older is still older, man.
The twins giggle and continue to speed up their juggling. At least until Hehehe loses focus and takes a fifty pound weight to the face, seemingly crushing in his skull. He flops to the ground and the other weights land on t5he floor by him. People in the gymnasium scream and run for their lives for the most part except for one or two people that run to his side to get his vitals. They stand and stare as if they have seen a ghost when a few seconds later, Hehehe stands up. His facepaint is smudged and bloodied, but he is otherwise fine. Hehehe puts his hands to the side of his head.
Hehehe - Son of a biscuit eater that hurt like being kicked in the face by a horse!
Hahaha - And how many times have you been kicked in the face by a horse?
Hehehe - Twice? No, three times.
Hahaha - Yeah, that maths. You want to restart?
Hehehe - No. I got a headache.
Hahaha - Yeah, I almost feel it too. Let’s do some pain meds.
Onlookers stare on in shock as the twins leave the bloodied weights on the floor and walk toward their gym bag before heading over to a table where refreshments are sold. Protein smoothies and the like. They get a vanilla brownie batter protein shake with two straws and sit down at a table to rest. Hehehe gets out a small bottle of pills from their gym bag and gets out a small pill grinder.
Hehehe - Oxys?
Hahaha - Why not? Just don’t crush up too many this time.
Hehehe nods while Hahaha pops one of the straws into the protein shake. Hehehe grinds up several pills and then cuts the straw in half. He gets out a credit card, not a real one, but one of those fake credit cards that you get with an offer of credit. The name on the card is Armand von Krauss. Hehehe takes it, dumps out the ground up pills, and forms them into lines with the fake credit card. He and Hahaha take turns snorting the drugs and follow this up with deep draughts of the protein shake. They sit there with absent smiles on their faces with people watching them closely as suddenly they begin to shake and their mouths froth before they fall to the floor and piss themselves. This time the ambulance is called to come and get them as they are presumed dead for real this time.
Just as paramedics come rushing onto the scene, both Hehehe and Hahaha get up and wipe drool from their mouths.
Hahaha - I told you not too many this time!
Hehehe - Do you hurt?
Hahaha - No?
Hehehe - You welcome!
The twins laugh hysterically as the paramedics look on in horror as two people whom were reported as dead get up as if nothing was wrong. The twins take notice of the people who were there to rescue them and laugh even louder.
Hehehe - This is nothing. My brother once had a knife with a quarter stick attached to it shoved into his gut and blew him in half.
Hahaha - Fucking Donzig.
Hehehe - He woke up in the morgue and had to crawl over to his lower half to get it back onto the rest of his body. I think the Medical Examiner fainted that day.
Hahaha - I thought he had a heart attack and died?
Hehehe - Oh right. You acted like a zombie and told him that you wanted to eat his brains.
Both - All we want to do is eat your brains. We’re not unreasonable. I mean no one’s gonna eat your eyes.
After a few moments and a quick check up on each of the twins, the paramedics make their way back to their ambulances and leave. The gym owner makes his way to the twins, his name is Tom Mullis, and he does not have a favorable look on his face.
Tom Mullis - Look here, freaks. You are going to need to go away. Leave this gym. You bled all over the floor and one of our weights. You vomited everywhere and made us think that both of you were dead. I’m not going to have this disruption anymore.
The twins look down onto the floor like they were bad children and see the fact that they puked up the protein shake everywhere and peed everywhere as well.
Hehehe - Okay. We go now.
Hahaha - We never meant to cause trouble.
Hehehe - Ok we lie. We mean to cause some trouble.
Hahaha - Ok…a lot of trouble. It was fun!
Tom Mullis - Get. Out. You need to go now before I call the police.
Hehehe - We go. We go!
Hahaha - No need to call police.
The twins walk out of the gym under the watchful eye of the owner until they are outside and get into a waiting limo. Esmeralda von Krauss is in the back of the limo. She is in a shimmering green dress and smoking an Egyptian cigarette with an emerald foot-long holder. She wrinkles her nose as the twins get into the back of the limo.
Esmeralda von Krauss - What happened to the two of you, dahling. You smell like vanilla vomit.
Hehehe - We were drinking a protein shake.
Hahaha - We were snorting painkillers. Maybe too much.
Esmeralda rolls her eyes as she takes in a long drag from the cigarette. As she exhales, she speaks.
Esmeralda von Krauss - Was für verrückte Kinder!
The limo begins driving to take the trio back to the hotel that they had rented. Esmeralda looks from one twin to the other.
Esmeralda von Krauss - Well?
Hehehe - Well -
Hahaha - What?
Esmeralda von Krauss - Well, you dumme Narren. How did you do on your training?
Hehehe - We did good. We worked out for hours before we did a little play too and I got hit in the face.
Hahaha - There was pain, so we did the painkillers.
Esmeralda von Krauss - That sounds like an idiotic thing to do, but it’s fine. Have you done any research into your opponents for the first round? It says the Fabulous Gator Boys on the card, but the Fabulous Free Gators on the roster for this…Wrestle: UK. Which name is correct? Do you know?
Hehehe - I think either is correct.
Hahaha - Yeah, I think either name is fine by them. They were brought together to gather the money to free the Florida Man from prison.
Hehehe - There are three of them, but only two of them will be actually on hand to wrestle.
Hahaha - Yeah, let me see. Let me see.
Hahaha takes out a grubby iphone and turns it on. He begins flitting through screens before settling on one. He hands the phone to his brother, who takes it with some reverence.
Hehehe - The first person on the team is “the Salford Squid” Callum Cornwall. I think I know him. I have seen him wrestle at a respectable place…before said place closed.
Hehehe hands the phone back to Hahaha, who flips through a couple of screens.
Hahaha - The second partner is Deacon Oldham. I don’t. I don’t know him.
Esmeralda von Krauss laughs and then takes a long drag from her cigarette, flicking ashes out through the window.
Esmeralda von Krauss - Deacon Oldham is a former Navy Seal that served in Desert Storm. He’s a decorated soldier that won’t just lay down for you in the ring. He will fight, kick, and bite his way to the finish line, dahling.
Hehehe - We aren’t afraid.
Hahaha - We have faced soldiers before.
Hehehe - We have frightened soldiers before.
Hahaha - However, we will give him the respect he deserves.
Hehehe - We will fight our hardest. Round one is where we make an impression on everyone else.
Hahaha - We will have to defeat this first team in a dominant fashion to show the others that we are here to fight. We are here to win.
Esmeralda plucks the cigarette butt from the end of the holder and sends it out through the window with a smile.
Esmeralda von Krauss - Good, dahlings! I would like to see you two win this tournament and then go on to take the Wrestle: UK tag team championship. It would be a fitting vengeance against Donzig for the slights done against us. Against Mr. Blood too.
Hehehe - Wrestle: UK, we are coming for those titles.
Hahaha - We are going to win this tournament and go on.
Hehehe - We know we aren’t technically pro wrestlers, but -
Hahaha - We have what it takes to be champions!
The scene fades to black as the limo drives away.
