Inasmuch as I believe that honesty should always prevail, most times being honest about certain situations comes out really harsh and could even cause harm.
There are also situations where being honest could cause more harm than expected, cause emotional and mental pain, but then the truth always finds a way of coming out. For instance, I can't visit a hospital and see someone in a critical situation that will certainly lead to death and tell the person that he/she is going to die. In this situation, a white lie is inevitable, because all I will do is give that person hope and be optimistic enough with the person. A white lie could be told to protect a person's, avoid misunderstanding and maintain peace. White lies are acceptable most times, because of the intention of the person, not because it's good or acceptable.
Few months ago, my younger sister visited a friend who died of a brain tumor last month, after the visit, she came home and told me, she kept telling her friend he was going to be fine and get back to his normal life, but she knew he wasn't going to survive it, because she saw the pains he was going through. That was really a sad experience. If she was being honest to a sick person struggling with his life, that would have caused more damage to the boy.
It would have been very insensitive to do so too, at that point, she had to be kind enough to tell him everything would be fine, even if she knew the truth and saw the family wouldn't be able to provide the money needed for his medication.
The fact is that in situations like this, you can only be kind, by suppressing the truth and coming up with a white lie.
Her intention was clearly to provide emotional support and comfort to her dying friend, we can't say she lied.
I have told white lies when necessary, especially to protect other people's peace, protect their esteem and ego. I can say I'm trying to be kind.
I tell white lies when I feel the person can't handle the truth or the truth will be our harsh to the person.
It's about my intention. Most times it's even to buy time, to wait until the person is ready to handle what is true.
I believe most people have also told white lies, it could be a false compliment or reassuring someone that everything will be fine, even when you are very aware that it might get harder.
For instance, being a Nigerian and saying" Better Days Ahead" seems like a white lie to me though. Considering the kind of leaders we have, if we decide to be more realistic, the chances of better days arriving are slim and even the path to better days will take a long time. But we choose to stay optimistic by lying to ourselves.
Because we all know the truth, but the intention is to be optimistic that one day reality might take a turn.
I believe it's the intention of lying that matters, more than the lie itself. We can't compare a lie told to deceive, manipulate, execute dirty desires to a lie that was told to protect a person.
A lie can't be considered wrong. When it's being told with a good intention, I'm not justifying the lie. Lying is wrong, but the intention of lying isn't always malicious.
Regardless of the fact that white lies most times are coming from a place of kindness, the fact is that they also carry the consequences of damaging friendships, relationships, trust and even preventing truthful conversations.
For instance, if a friend of mine is having an issue and is bold enough to ask for honest feedback, it's really good to be truthful to them regardless of how they perceive the truth. The fact is that, the truth is always embraced and accepted when it is coming from those we call our friends. The truth is that in situations like this, we just have to be bold and tell truth honestly without fear.
I believe Instead of using white lie as an excuse to misinform others or relying on white lies to avoid the consequences of our words to others, we can always embrace the truth, communicate the truth with respect and compassion to others.
A lie is still a lie, regardless of our intentions.
