If I'm not mistaken, the poem describes the inner turmoil of the poet, who struggles with negative thoughts and emotions that threaten to overwhelm them. Despite this struggle, there are glimpses of hope and beauty in the world around them, such as the light striking gold on the river. The poem ends on a somewhat ambiguous note, wondering if they will be able to find some sort of truth or meaning in their struggles. If that's the case, I can say that this is something I can relate