After hundreds of conversations with women telling me about how much they 'love(d)' a man I realize that most women (my former self included) have no idea what love really is.
Love isn't the hope or belief you have in a man's 'potential,' the same man who insults you, runs away or raises his voice when he can't understand you. That's not love, that's DELUSION.
Love isn't a 'feeling' you have for a man when things are great, but who doesn't text, call or show up when he says he will. That's not love, that's INFATUATION.
Love isn't a commitment to stick it out with someone when all the magic and feelings are gone because you're 'Doing it for the kids' or the hope for a better tomorrow. That's not love, that's MARTYRDOM.
Love isn't even spending time with a best friend who shares experiences, a sense of humor, an interest in the same set of activities and a compatible sex drive. That's not love, that's CONVENIENCE.
No, LOVE is the profoundly conscious and deeply intimate connection of body, mind, and soul.
Conscious love is when you can love without walls, hesitation and fear.
Conscious love is when you can laugh your loudest, cry your ugliest cry, and tell your deepest secrets without guilt or shame. It's a space of safety and trust so deep that it allows you to reveal your demons and stare fear in the face.
Conscious love is wearing your heart on the outside of your body, willing to risk being hurt or rejected.
Conscious love is strong and powerful. It can hold endless space with it's warmth, stability and firm boundaries.
Conscious love pushes you to be your best, but it wipes your tears and holds you close when you slip up.
Conscious love is pure and authentic, it has no agenda.
Conscious love can be messy and hard but it doesn't hold back. It pushes past the awkward and uncomfortable. It takes you to the bottom of yourself and allows you to see clearly. All delusion is gone. All that's left is truth.
Conscious love knows when it's safe to take the risk because it's mindful, and patient.
Conscious love is beautiful, it's magic, it's intoxicating, it's the way we were created to love and we know it when we experience it.
When you reach this level of depth and connection, nothing is off limits, no conversation too uncomfortable, and nothing needs to be hidden.
In order to attract this level of connection and be able to give this type of love to another you must have done your work. You need to be complete, with or without a partner. Only then can you love without attachment and fear. Only then can you make the conscious choice who you will give your love to. Only then can you love from your depths of your soul.
You're free to call anything you want 'Love,' but your soul will never release the ache it feels for a completely conscious connection with another human being in a space free of judgement, yet full of anticipation and expectation that you'll reach for and achieve your incredible potential.
Every woman was born with the right to a relationship like this.
