Friendship is one of those things that feels sweet when it is going smoothly , but when wahala starts , you begin to ask yourself if it is really worth it, see to me, I believe friendship is something you maintain with alot of effort, patience, and tolerance, because you see, no two people are exactly the same, even twins that are even born the same day do not think alike, so how much more ordinary normal friends who came into your life from different backgrounds?
When I think about friendships , I don’t just see them as vibes and enjoyment, I see them as connections that need understanding, but also at the same time, I will not lie, sometimes it is not that easy, when your beliefs and ideals are different from your friend’s own, you just begin to question how far you can stretch that friendship.
For example, I have had friends who believed strongly in things I do not believe in , see at first, I tried to just overlook it because, you know , friendship is supposed to be about acceptance and love in a way, but let me tell you, if your friend is constantly pressing their own belief down your throat, or always making you feel like your own ideals are nonsense, omo, that is a big red flag, that one is not friendship again, it has become stress.
I think the extent to which we can maintain friendships depends on respect, and respect is everything, If I have a friend who thinks differently from me but respects my own stand, then I do not see why we cannot still flow together, but the moment there is disrespect, or I start to feel like I am being mocked for what I stand for, that is when I will just quietly walk away.
Another thing I have noticed is that sometimes people think ending a friendship because of different beliefs means you are being intolerant , but that is not always true, there are situations where those differences can affect your peace of mind so much, so let’s say I believe in living a quiet life , but my friend believes life is only sweet when you are loud and always outside, at first, it might just look like differences in personality, but over time, it can start clashing badly , If we can not find middle ground, then maybe it is better to give each other space.
I remember one time I had a friend who always loved to argue about everything, if I say the sky is blue , she will start telling me that the sky is white and blue mixed that kind thing , If I say rice is better than beans, she will spend one hour trying to convince me that beans is superior lol, at first, I laughed it off and even enjoyed the banter, but over time it started to drain me in a way, every conversation turned into a debate , one day, I just asked myself, Why am I stressing over ordinary gist? I slowly started pulling back, not because I hated her, but because I knew our differences in how we see conversations was not something I could handle for long term.
So to me, maintaining friendship is good and it is very possible, but it has its own limits like If the differences are minor and do not affect your peace , we can manage, but if the differences are the type that constantly just brings quarrel, disrespect, or unnecessary kind of arguments, then abeg, I would rather protect my mental health.
See , at the end of the day, I believe friendships should be maintained as long as there is love and respect, but once the respect is gone , or the differences begin to look like chains holding me down, I will not even hesitate to step back, see this life is already stressful on its own, so friendship should not be another source of wahala.
This is my response to the Hive Learners Prompt Week 184 Edition 3.
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