It took me a long time to go to a higher institution, so anytime I saw my friends posting about their matriculations, I always felt this strong desire to experience it too. I imagined how joyful it would be, wearing the gown, taking pictures, and feeling like my life had finally begun. When my own admission finally came, I was happy, but strangely, nothing felt new. The freedom was there, yes, but I’m not someone who loves to go out, so it all just felt normal.
Then I thought to myself, “Maybe after graduation, things will feel different.” But when graduation came, again, nothing changed. In fact, that was the period I felt even more lonely and bored. The friends I used to see every day went their separate ways, and suddenly, I was left alone with silence and questions. That was when I realized that sometimes, the things we look forward to so much may not always fill the emptiness we imagine they will.
Now when I see people who are so eager to graduate, I just smile and say, “It will tire you.” Not because I want to discourage them, but because I now understand that adulthood is not as glamorous as it looks. There’s really nothing special about it, if anything, it’s more stressful. It’s a stage where everyone seems to depend on you, especially your younger ones. You become the one people expect to always have answers, money, and strength, even when you barely have enough for yourself.
I remember when birthdays used to excite me. I would count down to the day, plan how I would post my pictures, and even write long captions to thank God. But now, I just let it flow. Sometimes, I don’t even wish to post anything because it feels like nothing is really changing. We’re growing older, yes, but the excitement of it seems to fade year by year.
Maybe that’s what life does, it softens the spark that once burned bright. It teaches you that not every season comes with fireworks. Some seasons are quiet, slow, and repetitive. But even in the silence, there’s still something to be grateful for.
Now, when my birthday comes, I don’t rush to post or celebrate loudly. I just whisper a prayer and thank God for life, because at the end of it all, that’s what truly matters. The joy may not feel loud anymore, but peace has a softer voice.
And maybe, just maybe, that’s what growing up really means, learning to find meaning even when the spark doesn’t strike the same way it used to.
I am inviting 
