Woe to those who plan iniquity, those who plot evil in their beds! When they light the morning they execute him, because he is in the power of his hands. Micah 2: 1
There are cruel people disguised as good people. They are beings who hurt, who attack through a Machiavellian emotional blackmail based on fear, aggression and guilt. They appear to be altruistic people, but in reality they hide hidden interests and deep frustrations.
Many times it is said that "who hurts does it because at some point in life he has also been hurt". That nobody was hurt, hurt. However, although behind these ideas there is a real basis, there is another aspect that we always find difficult to admit: Evil exists. Cruel people sometimes have certain biological components that push them towards certain aggressive behaviors.
"There is no cruelty more evil than that born from the seeds of good."
-Baldassare Castiglione-
The scientist and disseminator Marcelino Cereijudo tells us something interesting. "It's not the wrong gene, but there are certain biological and cultural aspects that can provide." The most complex part of this topic is that we often tend to look for signs and pathologies in behaviors that simply do not fit into the psychodiagnostic manuals.
Malicious acts can occur without there necessarily being an underlying psychological illness. All of us, at some point in our lives, already know a person with this type of profile. Beings that give us with flattery and attention. Pleasant people, with social success, but who in private delineate a dark and enlarged shadow. In the bottom of their hearts breathe cruelty, lack of empathy, and even aggression.
Cruel people and the moral molecule
As we said before, today nobody was able to identify the existence of the gene of evil. However, in recent years, studies have increased in a fascinating aspect: the so-called "moral molecule". To better understand what this structure is, we will contextualize from a real story. A terrible story, which unfortunately happens a lot.
Hans Reiser is an American programmer famous for creating the ReiserFS file. Currently, and since 2008, he is in Mule Creek prison for murdering his wife. He had no problem pleading guilty and revealing where he buried Nina Reiser's body. As a curious fact, it is worth saying that this programming expert has a prodigious intelligence, the point of having started his university studies as a teenager.
After a speedy trial and having entered the San Quentin prison, he decided to prepare his appeal himself. Through 5 handwritten sheets, he argued that his brain worked differently. Reiser was aware of the studies that are carried out on oxytocin and used as an argument. According to him, he was born with the following problem: his brain did not produce a molecule called morality. Lack of empathy.
How to defend against camouflaged cruelty
In our daily life, we do not always relate to people as cruel as the one mentioned above. However, we are victims of other types of interactions: false goodness, covert aggression, manipulation, subtle selfishness, the most harmful irony, etc.
"The world is not threatened by bad people, but by those who allow evil."
-Albert Einstein-
These behaviors can be the result of several aspects. Lack of emotional intelligence, a low emotional environment where the person grew or even a deficit in the release of oxytocin. All this may determine that more or less covert aggressiveness. Anyway, we must not forget that when we talk about aggression, we are not referring exclusively to physical damage.
Emotional aggression, instrumental or verbal are less reportable injuries due to the need to be tested, but they are more common and that is why we have to defend ourselves. We will explain how.
Cruel people: know how to recognize and avoid them
We can all be victims of cruel people. No matter the age, the state or our previous experiences. This type of person can be found in the middle of the family, in work environments and in any other scenario. However, we can identify them in several ways.
The person of dark heart seduce us with the lie. They will camouflage themselves behind beautiful words and noble deeds, but little by little blackmail will emerge. And then, the creation of fear, guilt and mental violence.
Given these mechanisms, there is only one option: non-tolerance. It does not matter if it's our sister, our partner or a co-worker. The disturbancers of calm and balance seek only one thing: to end our self-esteem in order to have control.We will have the clear feeling that there is no way out. That they have us under their networks. However, it is worth remembering that "he is more powerful than he is master of himself." Therefore, it is important to end the game of domination and aggressiveness with determination.
The games of domination and covert aggression are very complex. However, it is necessary to act quickly to eliminate traps and react to veiled threats. The moment you feel discomfort or worry about certain behaviors, there is only one option: distance..