Ok, I’m done… but unofficially. I still didn’t tell the other part of my brain that there is still some intelligence left inside and that it can SOMETIMES have the right answers… and questions too. But the part which is necessary for learning, mostly for learning how to grow plants, is just… gone. Or maybe it just said to me: “Hey, you are an idiot, you truly have no idea what you are doing, just go… go and don’t come back.”
Yeah… But I believe the other part of my brain heard that and quietly said: “Hey… but what if we try it again? Maybe you still can succeed and your home will finally be beautiful and full of plants and roses and vegetables and herbs. What do you say? I will help you!”
And then the other part of my brain says: “Really? You will help me? That means I will finally learn? Ok, why not! LET’S DO IT!”
Guess what?
I fucked up again. 😂
And yes… I lost my gardening license… but only for this season. 🤔🥺 Because a few days ago I decided that I won’t give up, so I’m done for this year and my plan now is to spend the whole winter learning how the fuck plants can survive with a girl who just fucks everything up every single time. Hah…
Let me tell you a story about a girl who has absolutely no idea how to keep plants alive. I mean… people… I work in health care. I keep people alive. But I kill all the plants?! That’s just… not right. 😔🤦♀️
I can be very lucky that there is no Plant Police, because guess what? On Madeira there is actually something like that… not exactly Plant Police, but forest police. So if there was Plant Police, I would probably be sitting in prison for the rest of my life. 🙁
Ok, so a few months ago I already wrote about how bad I am at keeping plants alive and how I was still going to do something about it. I wrote about how I was planting everything, how I repotted my plant…the only plant I had in my apartment…and how much I had learned. I was so happy when my plant got new soil and fertilizer, and I was sooo proud of myself.
And when I did that and also planted everything outside, I was determined to do even more. I decided I was going to plant herbs and vegetables, and I even started a project to make a garden from pallets. Yeah, Pinterest is awesome for this kind of project. 😂
So I did it, and honestly, it wasn’t even that hard. You can see it in the photos… it looked sooo freaking cool! I was so happy because I really thought I would finally have my own herbs and that it was going to be amazing.
But then I decided to plant them a few days later because we went on a short trip. And I mean SHORT, because we were gone for only three days, and I believed they would survive without water for three days. But I didn’t count on the temperature going completely crazy… 35°C! Maybe that was a little too hot for my plants to survive?
Yes… it was too hot, because when I came home they were all dead.
No… I’m lying. 😂 Three tomato plants survived. That’s all.
I didn’t know what to do. I was so pissed at the weather and, of course, I was pissed at myself too. How can I fuck everything up?! Am I really this bad? 🙁 And then, when I looked at my plant… the only living plant in my apartment… I realized she was dying too. Slowly. And there was nothing I could do to save her. I didn’t even tell my friend who bought me this beautiful plant because she would probably kill me. (She almost did when she came to visit me and saw there was no plant inside anymore. 😂)
I almost cried because there were no more plants, and then my husband told me I should only buy LEGO flowers because those would definitely survive. And you know what? They are still alive. Yes, I didn’t break them. 😂
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? I still won’t give up!
Just because my tomatoes survived. JUST BECAUSE OF THAT! And you know what else survived? I put some seeds randomly into the soil and they started growing, stronger and more beautiful. I have absolutely no idea why.
Maybe they can survive without water, or maybe they just decided: “Ok, let’s make this girl happy. Let’s give her SOMETHING.” 😂
Luckily, my husband is a little better with plants. 👌
So yes… that is what I have now when I look around my garden… a few survivors, my little tomato heroes, and some mysterious plants that apparently decided I deserve a second chance.
So now, during autumn and winter, I will learn. I will learn how to keep flowers alive, how to keep plants and vegetables alive, how to keep herbs alive, and then we will see what happens next year!
Maybe 2027 will finally be the year when my garden stops looking like a plant cemetery. 😂🌱
And for now? I bought some plastic flowers just so my apartment doesn’t look so sad. Hmm… maybe when someone visits me they won’t notice that they are not real? Let’s hope they are very drunk, and then I can lie and say they are definitely alive. 😊😂
Because honestly…
My plastic flowers have a better survival rate than my real ones. 😂🌱
With love, 