I notice where I rush, beneath the urgency I often find a quiet fear that if I do not move quick enough I will somehow lose my chance,
I notice where I rush, I can feel myself reaching for completion whenever the middle becomes uncomfortable and gives me nothing impressive to hold onto,
I notice where I rush, sometimes I call it momentum when really I am trying to outrun the uncertainty of not knowing whether I am doing enough,
I notice where I rush, can I stay with this pace without turning slowness or not rushing another reason to question myself,
I notice where I rush, perhaps moving carefully is not falling behind but learning how much of me needs to be present before I can carry the next thing…
I build from what repeats, there are days when the same small effort feels almost insulting because I want evidence that I have already moved somewhere,
I build from what repeats, I sometimes underestimate the quiet changes because they happen too gradually for me,
I build from what repeats, part of me wants transformation to feel dramatic so I can finally believe that all the ordinary effort meant something,
I build from what repeats, can I respect the small differences even when I cannot see how far it has carried me through my goals,
I build from what repeats, what feels insignificant may become the very thing that makes a difficult moment less unfamiliar later…
I let the attempt remain, I resist the urge to erase what feels awkward because I know how quickly I can turn one imperfect result into a simple judgment,
I let the attempt remain, there is something humbling about seeing exactly where my hands could not yet do from what my mind believed they should,
I let the attempt remain, instead of hiding the weak parts I begin noticing what they are quietly showing me where I still need patience,
I let the attempt remain, can I look at what did not work without making the whole effort feel worthless,
I let the attempt remain, sometimes the roughest version carries the clearest evidence of what I need to understand next…
I trust the slower becoming, I still have moments when I want reassurance from all this quiet effort is leading somewhere I can recognize,
I trust the slower becoming, uncertainty feels harder when nobody can see the small changes except me and I have nothing finished enough to point toward,
I trust the slower becoming, I am learning that readiness can grow quietly without giving me the feeling that something important is about to happen,
I trust the slower becoming, can I keep caring for what I am building even when there is no visible proof yet that it will become what I hoped for,
I trust the slower becoming, perhaps the deepest change is happening precisely where I have stopped demanding as it announces itself…
Watchwords:
Beneath the urgency I often find
The same small effort feels
Where my hands could not yet
The roughest version carries
The slower becoming
Here is Tikatarot, who dares you to answer the question, “Who am I?”..
As and will always be reminding you to dream: