I Preserve My Inner Fuel

I guard my perceptions, I notice how easily my mind gets hooked by small provocations, like one sharp message can hijack my whole mood and make me forget who I really am,
I guard my perceptions, I admit I’ve treated my attention like it’s cheap, giving it away to irritation and worry, then wondering why I feel too drained and hollow on the inside,
I guard my perceptions, I confess I keep calling it “just stress,” but stress keeps taking pieces of me I don’t get back, and that truth makes me freeze,
I guard my perceptions, am I spending my life on reactions that don’t deserve any of my energy,
I guard my perceptions, I breathe and pull my attention back to what truly matters…

I pause to see what I’ve normalized, I notice how I stay in environments that keep tripping my triggers, then act surprised when my body feels exhausted and brittle,
I pause to see what I’ve normalized, seeing how I’ve treated emotional strain like a responsibility instead of a signal,
I pause to see what I’ve normalized, I confess I’ve ignored the warning signs, because leaving feels scary and staying feels familiar, and I hate that familiarity has power,
I pause to see what I’ve normalized, wondering if this daily pattern is the life I meant to build,
I pause to see what I’ve normalized, I tell myself I’m allowed to make a change too…

I want to preserve my inner fuel, aware that my body was not built to host constant sirens without eventually mistaking tension for normal,
I want to preserve my inner fuel, I admit I’ve wasted energy on petty battles, then had nothing left for the moments that actually needed my full strength,
I want to preserve my inner fuel, realizing I treated exhaustion as evidence of virtue, as though staying in misalignment showed resilience,
I want to preserve my inner fuel, am I saving my strength for what truly matters or spending it on something often it’s a noise,
I want to preserve my inner fuel, choosing calm not as weakness, but as dignity in action…

I stop bargaining away my freedom, I notice how I trade peace for tiny wins, like being “right” in an argument or being seen as competent in a crisis,
I stop bargaining away my freedom, I admit I’ve paid for approval with my steadiness, and it’s a price I keep pretending isn’t expensive,
I stop bargaining away my freedom, I confess I don’t want to be ruled by fear, pain, and constant tension, because that isn’t success, it’s a slow leak,
I stop bargaining away my freedom, asking what benefit I imagine comes from living in perpetual unrest,
I stop bargaining away my freedom, I take my mind back and hold it gently, and that is the decision that changes everything…

Watchwords:
One sharp message hijacks my whole mood,
Stress keeps taking pieces I don’t get back,
Leaving feels scary and staying feels familiar,
Am I saving strength or spending on noise,
I take my mind back and hold it,