I'm sitting here on the couch thought I have to write my story. These view past weeks I felt very tired and emotional. I thought it was because of the pregnancy. On Thursday I went for my checkup.
We were so exited about my 19weeks checkup at the doctor. So when we went in to do the scan. And there was it. BOOM the whole world was standing stil..... The doctor said there are no heart beat. BOOM. I am dreaming. I really thought I was dreaming. I just want someone to wake me up. I thought 馃挱
Its very heart to believe this. This past weeks i really felt tired. And last week i had a lot of headaches and by blood pressure was dropping. I thought it was normal. But yeah my baby past away view weeks ago i was supposed to be 19 weeks now. And the altrasound show that baby was 15 weeks when the heart beat stopped.
I am sorry that im talking about it and not about food. 馃槖
Im just very emotionally drained. I just ask God all the time why did this happend. Why did God gave me this bundle of joy and then take it away again. 馃槶馃槶
When i was in hospital they gave 馃拪 to drink. The next morning the baby came down. 馃槶 The baby was so small i couldn't see the gender.
After everything i went home. But yeah its not easy.
Its really not easy. I feel for the woman that lost there baby's. Oh and we must not forget about the men. The men also have feelings. I can see with my husband he is drained.
POEM
My little baby.
I cant understand why this happened. I dont have the answers. I don't have the answers. I am glad i could hold you even when you were such a tiny little baby.
I miss you in my tummy but ill always will remember you. My baby you are in Heavan now and we will meat again. I love you my baby. Your brother miss you hes asking about you. But we dont have the answers.
Rest in peace my little one mamma and pappa and DJ loves you.
Till we meat again.
I will write again my dear friend's. Its very sad on the moment. We are going to see a pastor on Sunday after church.
Have a wonderful Tuesday everyone.
