Today is the last day of 2017. I have only written two blog posts in 2017. "How to Build a Cult" and "How to Build a Cult - Part 2". When I started this blog five years ago I cared enough to write about my atheism or rather my anti-theism. I have changed in the past year. In speaking on the thought experiment of what it would be like to meet yourself from when you were a teenager at an older age, AJ Jacobs said recently on Sam Harris' podcast that his adolescent self was a real asshole and he probably wouldn't have gotten along with him at all. We change drastically over the years, not just mentally, emotionally, or figuratively, but also physically down to the cellular level. If I were to meet myself at the beginning of this blog five years ago maybe I would try to convince him to loosen this obsession with anti-religion. I don't really regret it, I just feel like it was a large waste of time.
My views have not changed at their core. I'm still an atheist. I still think religion, superstition, magical thinking poisons everything (except maybe art. Well, art from antiquity at least) I obsessed over reading friends who were still religious somehow, some of which were pastors, or youth teachers. I'd look over their social media rolling my eyes as they would write or comment about things that were fallacious and illogical. I laughed at how bad a philosopher their heroes were like C.S. Lewis or C.K. Chesterton. I laughed at how their beliefs really were babyish and they never really grew up. It was a sort of addiction. People close to me realized it and even told me I was obsessed. I spent a lot of time in email disputes regarding some Biblical nonsense, or trying to get people who were "open to the idea of evolution" to stop tap dancing around and give me a real concrete answer based in science on what they actually thought about the natural world and how life evolved over time. These people knew next to nothing regarding the scientific theories they questioned, but that's usually how it goes. It was not really much different from the young Earth creationists I grew up with who taught my science classes. These people are magicians. To be a good religious apologist in the modern era (I called them the New Christians), you have to learn how to debate well and wiggle out of anything by deflection, usually by using the newly politically resurrected "whataboutism". The philosophical arguments against god have won the debate centuries ago. This is not bias, this is just true. The smarter the person is the less religious he or she is. That's actually true if you look at the polls.
I wrote a lot in those last five years about my personal experience growing up in a religious family. Though I rarely see my family now but only once a year at best I am not nearly as exposed to religion with them. My dad is my only real outlet to the past in this regard. There has been noticeable damage done to my mother in regard to how religion has poisoned her view on reality and especially reality based in science and politics. Our history, the planet in general is all compromised by religion then fanned by Fox News idiocy. I wrote several blogs over a couple years called "Into the Lion's Den: Notes on a Recent Trip" where I blogged about my experience visiting my father and going to church with him. We also attended some Christian school fundraiser Bible trivia night, that was fun. My aunts and uncles on my dad's side are still steeped in religion, my cousins have of course seen through some of the fundamentalism but aren't quite comfortable letting go of their faith completely like I have. Religion just won't go away. It's deeply embedded in our apeness.
Last year's distraction was the election of Donald Trump. I wrote the blog posts about the cult-like behavior of his followers. There is something deeply sinister, tribal, and religious going on and it only makes sense in a country as deeply obsessed with superstition, magical thinking, and religious fervor, that someone like this cult leader could rise to power. It is also not surprising at all to me that in a country as religious as America most of the Evangelicals supported and voted for a man that openly bragged about grabbing pussies, married and re-married multiple times, calling war veterans weak for getting captured, or having a wife that has nude pictures online. It also goes to show you in many ways at our core our idiocracy is deep and we want a blend of religion and politics. The Evangelical right has wanted this for years. Just as long as it is their religion in charge.
I'll be bluntly honest here, the election of Donald Trump fucked me up. I am still not fully recovered. The night it happened I had a panic attack. I had to sit down because my legs and arms were shaking so bad. We handed our country over to a fucking tyrant. A neofascist cult leader who's religion was nationalism and hate of "the non-white" or the immigrant or of Muslims. The man doesn't have a religious bone in his body but with Trump its con from top to bottom. Everything you see and hear from this lunatic is a con. He *uses Christianity and Evangelicals as his own personal cult army. Trump I can guarantee you is an atheist. Knowing what we know about Trump can anyone convince me that the man thinks anyone or anything (this includes "god himself") is above him? Or is better than him? The man is a narcissist so much so using the word itself doesn't describe accurately the deep obsession with himself he displays. He is deeply delusional and dragging the country and the world into his delusion of his view of reality. When he lies 95% of the time you know you are dealing with a man that has no regard for the truth. This too lies at the heart of how he is always deeply misread.
The biggest criticism you hear from people who loath Trump is that he is stupid, incompetent, idiotic, etc. There is of course truth to this but it's describing him *inadequately. He is of course not intelligent by way of scholarly knowledge or IQ. The man really does know staggeringly little about basic facts in the world and our country. But so did George W. Bush. Bush and Trump are clearly different. In fact they can't really stand each other and Bush warns that Trump is ruining the republic and isn't really a true conservative Republican, he's just using the party to gain authoritarian power. With G.W. Bush you have a guy who was ignorant but had smarter people in his inner circle surrounding him who were giving him little nudges along the way. Something that Trump is of course not remotely going to let happen. The media and many people got this wrong too. Trump is not influenced by anyone but Trump. This couldn't be any more obvious. He only does what he wants. He is like Putin. You don't tell these authoritarians what to do or guide them in any way. At least not successfully. You don't help guide or influence extreme Narcissists.
It is not *merely that Trump is stupid and incompetent. This is like saying Putin takes his picture with his shirt off too much to show he's manly. This is a feature of a narcissistic authoritarian gangster but it isn't his *defining feature; it doesn't get to the exact heart of the problem with Putin. No it's that Putin is stealing the Russian people's money and keeping everyone in Russia in this fake democracy, actual police state. It's actually worse than this comparison because Trump's ignorance is independent of his decision-making process. In other words, Trump cares nothing about the truth or being correct about issues, or learning, or building his knowledge UNLESS it will enrich himself and his brand, family, etc. Trump will embrace something that's true... Take the uprising of the people of Iran now against their authoritarian government and his open support of this. This is a good thing... but he only does this when it aligns with his goals. Trump's only goals have always been gain more power, money, fame. That's it. That's exactly why he became president in the first place. In the Iran example he's painting the picture that Iran is a terrorist state to bolsters his authoritarian position on immigration.
This is the type of thing that happens to me now in 2017. I'm in a constant state of panic. I set out to write this blog as a review of the past five years and as he always does, Trump has taken over my thoughts; he has taken over my life. This is what it must feel like to have an abusive spouse, living in a constant state of panic, worried if the mad man will do or say something else that could cause a nuclear war for literally no reason. Something big is going on here in American and we're right in the middle of it. Religion has primed this, tribalism (the true backbone of religion) of course is threaded throughout this problem fueled by a decade of propaganda from the right from Fox News to talk radio. These screaming imbeciles have created their own cult and it's called Middle America, mostly older, white, working class people with some upper middle class people as well. They have gotten these people to vote directly against their financial interests by voting for Wall Street, bankers, and CEOs. The con was started long ago and Trump is the physical manifestation of Fox News-type alternate reality painted for these cult members day in and day out. When I go home to my family's houses Fox News is always on. It is never turned off and my family actually thinks Fox News is fair and balanced because you know the rest of the entire world is liberal.
I would say another word for that would be ... "sane". The rest of the world is sane.
There is hope for 2018 for this country right? Democrats take back control of congress and we finally impeach this mother fucker already, right? Mueller's investigation concludes and Trump and his ilk are removed from office and sent to fucking jail where they belong for fucking TREASON, right? Or just more hourly madness? I cannot even bare to read the news headlines anymore on my News App. More bat-shit idiocracy tweets from our President about how global warming is a hoax, etc etc etc etc. We have finally reached the end of this god-awful year for America and everything is falling apart. Let me remind you, this is year one of four for President Donald Trump. But our institutions are still standing. So far. Trump hasn't fully turned us into a neofascist third world hell-hole yet. He hasn't yet started a totally avoidable nuclear war with North Korea or trade war with China. There is something to hang hope on isn't there? Our country is getting less and less religious right? The younger generation is dropping religion like a bad habit in the past several years because they are finally realizing its fucking childish nonsense their family's pushed on them. The statistics look really good for those of us who want this shit to go away or at least get more under control. We have that to be happy about, but we still have this man in office and I still want so badly to stop being distracted by him. First it was religion, now it's neofascism.
It was first obsession with anti-religion and fighting with those who were religious or Christian apologists. That's so clearly a waste of my time now that I don't even bother thinking twice about some Bronze Age gibberish. I have too much else to worry about. Now I have to worry about a cult leader as President. An atheist *using religion to build a cult. A man who is truly and best described as "pure evil", The ideal Con Artist. He now sucks up all my attention. I just graduated with my degree in Earth and Environmental Science and I'm entering into a country slashing environmental regulations, making massive cuts to the EPA, shoveling money into old dirty energy, and opening up National Parks for resource extraction. Meanwhile record-breaking storms, fires, flooding, and drought is taking place all over this country alone, but these people won. It's over, right?
My family is religious, my family likely voted for Trump. Most of them did at least. Not my brother of course and I'm sure a few others. My mother won't tell me because of course she voted for Trump, let's just be real here, and she knows I'll lose my shit over it. Most of my family voted against my future and voted against people I love deeply. I have several people in my life who are peaceful contemporary Muslims. I have several friends who have immigrated from Mexico. My family picked a side and that side was with the cult leader. My father actually was the one exception to the rule. He didn't vote at all. Who saw this coming? I sure didn't. He said he couldn't vote for Trump and I asked him why after thanking him over and over. Was it because after I graduate I want to do things that this administration will completely undo? Was it because I have people in my life that I love very much that are Iranian and would be possibly banned from visiting their family in their country of origin?
No.
It was because of something my dad said that I would "think was probably stupid". Well, I'm sure I would. My dad turns the channel when a cuss word is uttered, so I'm sure it was some silly dogmatic rule. I guess at least, unlike most Evangelicals he's consistent in his beliefs. He wouldn't tell me but my guess is it had something to do with Melania posing nude or Trump being married multiple times. I'm not sure. But it was something dogmatic silly rule that hung up my dad just enough that he couldn't quite bring himself to cast a vote for Donald Trump. Never mind the obvious reasons not to vote for that utter piece of shit. The list is too long to go into here.
So after five years and a cult leader as President, thinking about my dad's decision to not cast a vote for the cult leader and for whatever silly reason he made that decision, maybe I should revise my outlook ...
Religion poisons most things!
*Originally published on 12/31/17 on my blogger account: https://godsaiditibelieveitthatsettlesit.blogspot.com/
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