Hello folks!!! This is something I've written. Thought I would post here and learn from your feedback and try to improve. So, please give it a read and let me know your feedback in the comments below.Here goes...
Its 11 o'clock in the night. Saul’s diner is packed with people from all over the town. People of different colors, different professions, different mindsets and different personas all gathered in one place chit chatting with one another, being social, trying to mimic a good society. Everybody has a story to tell, everybody wants to talk and wanna be heard when they do. But among all this rush, all this happiness and bliss, there is one man, sitting in the corner by the window all by himself in a full sleeve shirt and a worn out jeans. This man doesn’t seem to talk to anybody, he doesn’t have a story to tell. He is just sitting all alone peering into his cup of coffee. His eyes give away his loneliness instantly and his sadness is noticeable from his face.
This man is a 25 years old construction worker with no friends and family. He lives in the city alone. He goes by the name of John. People at work don’t really know anything about him, where he’s come from, where is his family, nothing. All that they know about him is that he doesn’t talk much. After sitting in the diner for about an hour John leaves for home, a two bedroom apartment in the tallest building of the city. He decides to take a walk home. He walks out the front door with his earbuds on, playing hard metal songs. He starts strolling on the sidewalk, he sees a homeless man begging for money. He stops for a second and then starts walking again. He crosses the street and heads to the apartment complex, a series of tall buildings with cheap apartments. A lot of voices can be heard outside, somebody is fighting with his wife and a man is being hard on his kids, same old shit. The alley is mostly dark and full of muggers.
Everyday crime happens on these streets and back alleys but no one’s been able to stop them for years. The mayor is busy making the gang lords happy and the commissioner of the police department is also not a very dutiful person. All that is left is every man for himself, a perfect stage to play anarchy and spread chaos. All it takes is one spark that can ignite a poor man’s rage and you can destroy cities and wipe out peace. The city is at the brink of collapsing, with crime rate sky high and no one to stop it.
John gets home switches on his television set and crashes onto the sofa. Broadcast is full of old shit, the news is just a daily report of atrocities all around the city, a bank robbed in the morning, a girl raped in her house, a father murdered by gang members, kids slaughtered in front of their mother.
“All these barbarities and I’m sitting here watching T.V., doing nothing…” John said to himself.
The mere thought of watching his home burn to ashes, changed something inside him. All his life he’s been a no body, a coward who was so afraid he couldn’t do anything to save his own family…
To be continued…
This is the first time in my life that I've tried to write a story. I really need your feedback. Do tell me how I can improve myself, I really need guidance.
Thanks a lot. Stay happy and make this world a better place.
