There are times when the right thing to do is not a matter of simply choosing between what is right and what is wrong, but instead choosing among many good things at the same time, which, at the moment, is exactly where I find myself.
My rent on my house is due at the end of the month and as each day passes by, the pressure associated with that continues to creep silently in the back of my mind, because the place you live is something you cant really choose to ignore or to put aside. Also, i have incurred a debt that i had promised to pay by the 21st of this month, which is another layer of responsibility that cannot be ignore, for reasons of trust and obligation to the other person.
The icing on the cake is another scenario that should make me sigh with relief. However, instead, its compounding the difficulty in making a choice. After two years without a job, a friend is sending me some money from abroad, for the purpose of starting a small business and build something for my financial future. This is exactly what i have been looking forward to.
But the reality is, the money won't be enough to cater for it all and there lies the real and rather frustrating dilemma. I am now face with the dilemma on how to best utilize that money.
Should I pay my house rent with the money?
Doing that will immediately relieve me of my house rent obligations and also help me relax for a moment as i wont have to worry about finding somewhere to put up.
But it then means i wouldn't be able to pay my debt, nor would i be able to kick start the business plan I have been looking forward to with the money.
Should I pay my debt first?
By doing this i would free myself from the pressure and obligations but i will still be facing the huge hurdle of how to get the rent money from.
Ok, should I put all funds towards the new business initiative?
By this i would be laying grounds for a new and hopefully better future, but would have to struggle with putting up a roof over my head as well as settling my debt.
They are all viable and important choices that I cant just shove under the carpet. There are real consequences for each choice. All options present valid and understandable avenues but one and the other would suffer, one way or the other.
Because there will be things that I would eventually regret putting off but I would also feel a huge amount of relief in settling any of the current pressing concerns.
This is definitely not an easy decision.
It teaches you the reality that life doesn't always present you with simple dilemmas. They offer more choices, often good ones, leaving you to wrestle with your priorities. In addition to this reality, life also often teaches that, when everything feels uncertain and nothing is truly easy, the value lies in having the courage to decide anyway.
I am still pondering and trying to figure things out and I do have faith in what ever i choose as its my responsibility now to make a decision and go with the flow, knowing that my decision today, for good or for bad, is what is going to take me to my tomorrow.
