The sun is not here yet and I have to come here to cleanse the aftertaste of a trigger I went looking for this morning. I partially feel like lessons don't sink properly here but I am also glad that the progress I have made is calmly whispering to my soul that I am always allowed to be human.
Flawed.
Perfect imperfection.
Trust is weighty. Like the truth trying to fit in the corridors of corrupted courtrooms. Rightfully I still choose to speak and preach it but my doubtful bones have refused to house trust with an open mind. Let time know that I am here waiting for her to wave her magic wand. To hold my hand through what feels like eons and I am the snake looking to shed her skin.
Looking to evolve.
Awakening the revolution I am.
Speak in friendlier tones or I will leave the dialogue. My ears have held the secrets of hateful echoes for a while as I went on to keep a cold smile. Countless belittling glitching recordings held the airwaves for a lifetime and I might have snuck back in the back of my deranged mind to press pause.
Breathe woman.
Breathe.
I have fought to keep having air cruise my lungs. Fought to be here. Fought not to be fought. Though it all left me scattered in my own skin, I feeling entitled to another chance at the good things I have lost. I can't afford to deny warmth to my freezing being.
Find light.
Let light find you.
I wish to remind myself that I am allowed to have nostalgic feelings over a seemingly perfect past experience but I need to make room for what the future holds. The future starts in the next second and living it should be the main goal.
wambuku w.