Tomorrow I head back to work after a couple weeks of "holiday" where I didn't really do anything vacation-y at all. But today, one of my work colleagues visited with his wife and we enjoyed an afternoon of eating pies and talking about the ills of the world - where Corona and the knock-on problems of the way it is getting handled featured heavily. A lot of it being economic, but there are a lot of social concerns.
What is often interesting is when the economic implications of the situation are raised, a lot of people tend to say "you can't put a price on life" as if that means that spending money has no affect on people's experience. I would suspect that many of us in this world would cite economic uncertainties as one of (if not the) largest concerns in our life and it is likely one of the greatest stress points for many. This position has its own consequences and will affect all manner of things that are important to us, including our relationships with the people we love.
I know that for my wife and I and especially over the last few years since my daughter was born, our financial situation has been the source of a lot of discussion and worry, as like many, we have struggled at times to meet our obligations and responsibilities. Often, it is the case of two steps forward and one back, but there are sometimes the one step forward and two back issues also, where for some reason or another, the outgoing expenditure spikes and the modest gains made have a large chunk bitten out of them.
If it was easy, it wouldn't be valuable.
While a lot of relationships suffer when under financial hardship, I wonder if some get stronger because of it, where a couple find ways to cooperate and complement each other in order to meet the demands of life. While I am sure there is a law of diminishing returns in play, I would suspect that a little overcoming for a relationship creates a stronger bond between two people so that they are willing to combine resources and compound their results.
The saying is, behind every great man is a great woman' but I think this is a very limited and rather immature perspective. I think that in a well-functioning relationship, the support is going to go both ways and will depend on the circumstances of the moment. Sometimes one will support the other, sometimes it will be reversed. In my opinion, the most valuable relationship is one where two people are motivated and supported to be their best, but what that means for the individual is unique, as the targets will change, as will the methodology and incentives. What brings out the best in one, might not bring out the best in the other - so part of the relationship is understanding each other deeply and with the insight, wisdom and maturity to learn how to support the other and vice versa. A one-sided flow of support will build one and leave the other stunted and potentially resentful.
Sometimes I wonder if my wife and I hadn't had the trialing experiences we have had, would we still be together or would we have left each other due to a loose tether. It is of course impossible to know for sure, but I believe that a couple who have a sense of overcoming challenge together will form a stronger bond with each other. It doesn't mean that everything is pleasant, but it can mean that the challenges that are bound to arise in the future are approached with the track-record of we did it last time.
Maybe, this means that potentially greater challenges can be faced which often happen as we age, but also that while times are good, we are able to claw back more ground that was left when times were not. but perhaps more importantly than this, the bond is created through shared experience and that means that going into an uncertain future, there is the potential to share the load knowing, we aren't in this alone.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
Before our guests arrived, the three of us went out and picked some gooseberries from the garden and this little fella was looking for a meal. The berry is about one centimetre in diameter, so the snail was only a couple millimetres long.
