so I hope it is OK to make this type of post here.

Absolutely, and thanks for posting in the community. You are always welcome with these kinds of posts :)

St Nick

Your example is salient for me, as just today my daughter acknowledged that Santa isn't real, something that she ha been dancing around for a few years already, but not ready to give up on the belief. When you say the lie was for your benefit, this is also something I connect with, because I was never told the lie, but was told that some kids believe, so don't ruin it for them. What stuck out to me was that despite how I might have been treated around that age based on their beliefs about me, I never ruined it for them.

I can’t be sure on this point, but for the most part I think bias is generated when there’s an answer that will in some way make you feel better.

You bring up the "blame others to make oneself feel better" and I believe that this is what culture is encouraging now, where a victimhood mentality and subsequent behaviors are rewarded (by strangers) on social media and in the news. I see it as dangerous, as while it might make us feel better, it also takes away our agency to do anything about it, to be the change. Instead, the action becomes one against the "perpetrator", the enemy, even if the attack was imaginary.

One of the most useful techniques I’ve found is to find another rational person who is either unbiased on the topic or even biased in the opposite direction and debate the issues and evidence with them.

One of the most valuable things a person can build, is a strong reference group of people who might not believe or think the same, but can be trusted to give their rational opinion.

So I guess the last point I want to make in this post is if you’ve really thought something through well and you’ve really given a full consideration to opposing ideas, sometimes you may want to “go against the tide” and trust your reasoning.

I like that you mentioned this, because while I do think going against the tide is generally the best way to go (masses are not that smart), it also brings in accountability. It is easier to follow the group and fail together, than go against the group and fail alone, but when understanding that we are responsible and accountable for our own experience as a human, even in failure, we can be glad that we lived our life, rather than by the rules of the crowd.

Having said that, I believe that your "against the tide" is not the average tide, but more from informed reference group kinds of waves. They are therefore probably more likely to give solid arguments, so it is far harder to go against them. The challenge I see for society these days is that social group relationships are weaker and people rely on the opinions of strangers on the internet, rather than qualified and vetted reference people. This is isolating at a personal level, and reduces decisions down to the perceived direction of the masses. The "average body type" doesn't mean healthy.

On average, most people get average results - but the only people who want to be average, are those who know they are less than that and want to improve.

Thanks again for posting in this community, as this is exactly the kind of reflection I have hoped for and reading through the comments, it looks like more reflection is being done :)