because we forget what led up to that so called perfect past.

We cherry pick based on availability bias and even at the time, we weren't really paying that much attention.

Now share a cup of coffee or a beer, then you can learn something about the person.

Completely agree.

The idea that we are able to put ourselves in other's position is insidiously evil and I think it has been engineered to be another control mechanism. Don't be empathetic, be compassionate.