Since the summer, I have been looking for a neuropsychologist to help me navigate some of the cognitive challenges I have, with zero luck. I was given a list of them by the healthcare system to call and either all of them have been "fully booked" (despite me knowing they are not) and some of them decided they couldn't do it in English (despite them all being highly educated in Finland, where English is compulsory, as all the medical books are in English). So, I have been going through the list trying to get in contact with someone who is willing to work with me. Finally today, I got a call-back from one of them and thankfully, they will take me on. But before they did so, they said - we see each other at the gym.
Great.
He saw the name and was actually the neuropsychologist who tested me originally saying nothing could be done just after the stoke. That wasn't his fault though, as it was through the general healthcare system where they have guidelines where being average is good enough. However, he is now in private part-time and since it is being paid for (ironically by the healthcare system that said nothing could be done, when it would have been better to do it five years ago), things can indeed be done.
He was asking whether I was comfortable having him as my treatment professional and since I don't have any other options apparently, it is fine. Though to be honest, what do I care anyway? This is Finland, everyone knows everyone anyway. Plus, I have seen him at the gym (but didn't remember he did the testing because I was largely out of it at that point) and he is in really good shape, so if I get no brain condition improvement, perhaps I can get some fitness tips.
I actually don't expect much from any of this treatment now, but since I don't have to pay much for it myself and I am very interested in the area anyway, it is good to be able to sit down with professionals and dig into the weeds of it. Hopefully there are some strategies he can suggest and I can practise that helps me, but even if there isn't, it is welcome to have someone to talk to who is equally as interested (if not more so) in this kind of thing.
Despite it all affecting us, most of us aren't actually very interested in our own cognitive processes and how to improve them at a practical level. As I have said before, I think we are made up of four key parts where there is the physical, mental, emotional and social sides of us that need to be working well and in harmony to truly have a fully balanced and high quality life. But, most people I find aren't interested in actually developing much in any of these areas (physical being the easiest to improve for most) and will actively avoid them. The "mental health" side is super popular, but that is rarely actually what most people do anything for, as they are actually looking at their emotional health, how they feel about things. Very important of course, but if the other aspects aren't healthy, we are going to feel crap by almost default.
Feelings are indicators only.
We shouldn't be trying to change our feelings directly, but rather understand what our feelings are pointing toward and working on those things. When we feel discomfort or pain, we should be looking at what the underlying causes are and understanding why they cause the discomfort. Discomfort isn't even necessarily a bad thing, since it is a key part of learning, so if we avoid discomfort, we avoid personal development. And avoiding that means, more discomfort.
A nasty cycle of self-deprecation.
But, in a few weeks I will meet with the neuropsychologist for the first time and see if there is any way I am able to self-appreciate and add some value toward my cognitive abilities. Funny isn't it? When we think of the word "appreciation" of a person we tend to go toward the being grateful for them. Nothing wrong with that, but what we are actually doing is judging what they do and adding a value to them or their skills - we are appraising and setting a price. When we appreciate ourselves, we would have to improve ourselves first, unless we are appraising ourselves for the first time in that area. At least in my opinion, we should think about what true appreciation for ourselves or others means, because it is a personal judgement call and if we are not thinking about it, we are judging blindly.
Many don't agree with my views of the world when they hear them.
Often it is because they have never fully appreciated the situation or conditions that are faced and it is only later when something has made them pay attention, that they realise I might be right. But, there can be years between point A and B there, so by then they think they were right all along.
Anyway, along these lines I had a very interesting conversation with a friend on the phone today, but I will get to that later, because it is a bit out there perhaps. Or maybe, a bit unexpected.
Taraz
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