I promised myself and the wonderful person whom told me I may be good at blogging and writing that I would give this a try and I promised myself that I'd be authentically myself no matter what people thought or said.
One thing I really want to touch base on is that time of the month ladies. Mostly because she's a raging you know what... and I am a whole mess, not a peice but the whole mess. Periods are a very taboo subject. Growing up I was taught to never speak about it. Just it was going to happen tell mom and deal with it. We are in 2025 now and as women in many parts of the world and where I'm from in america are fighting for our rights daily now I don't care who is uncomfortable.
What are your signs that mother nature is on her way to wreck your existance? Is it..
This last weekend was good. Everything seemed to be going well then... Monday came around and I'm starting to become more intune with my body over the years and the same crap happens EVERY single month.
The week prior to my period is when it all sets in. Everyone hates me, the world hates me, my guinea pigs hate me, the world is out to get me, that random object I just tripped over is the bane of my existance, hobbies turn into chores and I'm 30 and an immigrant with no job and learning Swedish turns into the most exaughsting task ever. Friends, family and people make me exaughsted.
Then If people are like.. Not sure if this is a most women thing... or a neuro-divergent brain... thingy but someone is like... Mariah... You should do... or I think of some task that will make it all better. I spend the next week or so day dreaming about it sometimes doing it but holy crap I really want it.
Had a good friend this time say Mariah I think you should do this... and I was thinking who on earth would like to read or listen to me ramble on about nonsense and my life as boring as I can be... WHATEVER here I go. I'll probably start menstrating at some point today she feels like she is here and knocking on my uterus walls looking to wreck the day.
I went to class today finally after thinking the world was ending Mon-Wed this week after I busted my butt on a hill. Just really needed to come home and let out my words. Supposed to hang out with friends on the internet today playing my video games and i'm sitting here trying to think about how my brain will function around people.
If you made it this far thank you for listening to me. I really needed to complain about it. Now i'll go drink some water do my puzzle and probably rage at that for awhile...
