Individually, I think we attach value to a lot of things other than ourselves, especially when we are young. It's hard to say 'I am of value' during our childhood era, unless we were conditioned by our environment and perhaps, our parents or guardians to see ourselves that way.
I personally didn't have a track record of that. But what I did was ascribe the sense of worth to my parents and since I'm their offspring, I hoped that one day I will also become a person of worth.
I don't know, but these days I try a bit harder to pinpoint where the sense of worth lies individually. Is it in the things we do or in what/who we are?
If it is in the things we do, then do we stop becoming worthy when we stop doing those things?
If it's in what/who we are, then do we stop becoming worthy when we stop being who/what we are?
Life's dynamic, attaching a sense of worth to anything external is bound to crumble one way or another.
Internally, however, there seems nothing to attach our sense of worth to either, since thoughts and emotions are also ever changing. Is there something substantial and permanent to anchor our self-worth into?
Picture existence as a vast, ever-shifting ocean. We, as individuals, are like small boats navigating its currents.
In our youth, we often look to external anchors for stability and value. We might tie our self-worth to our parents' approval, academic achievements, or social standing.
As we mature, the ocean's currents become stronger, and the external anchors start to strain. We begin to experience periods of feeling adrift, questioning our purpose and value. This is the essence of the existential crisis, why are we on the ocean and what are we doing on it?
This experience often carries a distinct nostalgia. And we reminisce about childhood, a time when our sense of self was simpler and more defined by external validation. Sometimes, we might romanticize the past, yearning for the stability and certainty it seemed to offer.
However, just as the ocean shapes the coastline, our experiences shape us. I think when we revisit these memories, we gain a new perspective(s). For one, we begin to see that the simplicity of childhood was an illusion, in that we were somehow shielded from the reality of it all.
Secondly, we begin to understand that true growth lies in moving forward and embracing the ever-changing currents of existence.
Asking these questions of why's or what's of existence from the ordinary mind leads to more chaos and uncertainty. From that point of view, there's no single, fixed answer to these questions.
Just as the ocean is ever-changing, so too are we. Maybe, the key is to learn to navigate the currents without clinging desperately to anchors that may not hold.
Or perhaps, we can cultivate a compass, a sense of self-worth that is independent of both internal and external circumstances. This compass could be guided by our values and principles(which I believe are beyond our thoughts and emotions), or simply the intuitive need to live authentically.
Thanks for reading!! Share your thoughts below on the comments.
