There's a common saying that many of us tend to take to heart, especially in social situations.
In my experience, the phrase "actions speak louder than words" is a well-intentioned advice that sometimes leads us astray, particularly when we interpret it too literally.
During social settings, I've noticed a tendency for people to rely solely on their actions to communicate, discarding verbal explanation altogether.
Of course, I'm guilty of this, on numerous occasions, I tend to believe that my intentions or feelings are crystal clear based on what I do.
But here are two examples that say otherwise:
A partner who buys expensive gifts but doesn't verbalize their love, making their significant other feel that the relationship is materialistic.
A colleague who works late every night without explaining their motivations might be perceived as a workaholic rather than dedicated.
In both cases, the actions alone, even well-intentioned, can be misinterpreted or underappreciated without proper context.
I think the true essence of "show, don't tell" may not be to eliminate telling altogether. But to put it in a sequence, in the sense that you show first, then tell rather than only showing without telling.
Part of the reason why I think so is that actions grab attention and create an initial impression, words then provide context, clarifying intentions and deepening understanding.
If it were just showing without telling, then it would seem more like a silent movie to me. We'd be left to interpret everything on our own, possibly missing crucial nuances and deeper meanings.
Actions can be powerful yet they lack the precision of words to convey complex thoughts and emotions.
Of course, one could also argue that it boils down to personal preference or predispositions, some find it natural or easier to just show or just tell without doing the other.
In a way, this is understandable but I think it's more beneficial to work on the one we're not good at instead of constantly defaulting to what we're good at.
Since it helps us become more well-rounded communicators, capable of adapting to different situations and people.
The underlying point is that both are important, especially in social dynamics and interpersonal relationships.
The "tell" part is where I believe the magic happens. Because it's in the telling that we can provide context, share our thought processes, and express our emotions more precisely.
It's like a bridge that connects our actions to our intentions, ensuring that our message is received as we meant it.
For instance, imagine a friend who always remembers your birthday with a thoughtful gift. That's a really wonderful gesture, but when they also tell you why they chose that particular gift and how much your friendship means to them(perhaps, through a handwritten letter that accompanies the gift), it elevates the entire experience to a whole new level.
Now, that's something that really captures the essence of effective communication in personal relationships.
Thanks for reading!! Share your thoughts below on the comments.
