She had a cubical-shaped hell - I have an open-space hell. I don't remember her description of her hell, but I'd like to call mine the 10th circle of hell; on par with Dante's Inferno. The difference is, my hell is right here in the world of the living - ever present and torturous, and it promises confinement of souls with no escape... yet. My hell looks exactly like a prison and I'm serving a sentence with no crime in my name.
You may think I'm being dramatic - I'll tell you something. I barely complain about anything. How can I complain about anything else when this "open-space hell" torments me for 9 to 10 hours every single day (if I include the time to commute) and leaves no room for any other worries to cloud over me! I am being a tad dramatic since so many people can survive and thrive in this hell; maybe - just maybe - I'm not cut out for this. But all my theatrics have reasons and I also my intense distaste towards something has a justifiable cause.
Well, she was lucky to only suffer through for 3 months, and during that period, I was her favorite mode of entertainment but I don't have that luxury. All my days seem like I'm trudging through a terrain knee-deep in mud. Sadly, my prison sentence is running longer than hers did with little chance of parole or grand escape. I wish digging a tunnel through the floor would grant me a safe passage or my prison sentence getting drastically reduced to nothing which would allow me freedom but my luck isn't favorable. And I suffer and suffer while in confinement, I work which drains me down completely.
And my other inmate?! Even though all our sentences vary and our chores are different, we are all caged here. Some of them are so in tune with everything that goes around that they have become a part of the very foundation and/or fine specimen of permanent citizens. Oh, I envy them. Those poor souls have been caged here for more than 10 years and even some almost 25 years - like they never had a life before. They prefer being around here so much so that they barely acknowledge their life outside the box. Such a pity but who am I to say anything! Prison life takes away the essence of our soul on a daily basis and keeps our mind caged - mine too, regardless of how much I want to break free. But prison is only effective as long as the personnel is productive, right?
And in the midst of all this, I forgot to tell you about the prison guards. Whereas our kind warden is strict and just, our guards, for the lack of better words, are dimwitted, ancient-minded, and quite temperamental. But often the guards and other inmates get along splendidly and often the inmates vilify the so-called guards. Even though I don't use derogatory terms to describe them, I often find myself joining my fellow compadres to release some of my frustration. Well, what can I say, sometimes they bring out the worst in people. Oh well, that did it.
I never thought I had this much to say about my prison, and I guess I was wrong.
