we pray for god.god prays for Chuck Norris

Chuck norris let the dogs out Chuck Norris wants some more

Chuck Norris can beat you up with a grain of sand

Chuck Norris favorite color is pink. No homo.

When Chuck Norris watches, the paint dries instantly.

Chuck Norris can choose his friends... his neighbors... his parents and family.

Chuck Norris always have butterflies in his stomach because he eats butterflies for breakfast

Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground

Chuck Norris doesn't need a debugger, he just stares down the bug until the code confesses.

When Chuck Norris was little, he once played with some blocks. Those blocks today are known as the Stone Henge.

Chuck Norris won't be Mr. Rogers' neighbor.

Chuck Norris underwent successful hemorrhoid surgery yesterday. The surgeon had to use "the jaws of life" and a set of bolt cutters to complete the procedure

Chuck Norris cornrows his crotch hair.

Chuck Norris' beard has a Twitter account, a Myspace page, and a bestselling biography by Mick Wall. A HBO miniseries is currently in the works.

Chuck Norris was at a restaurant when the waitress asked if he would like to try their Tofu. Chuck said "lady, I'd rather piss upwind in a hurricane".

Chuck Norris calls a spade a spear.

Chuck Norris is the biggest boss that Rick Ross has seen so far.

One time Jason Voorhees made fun of Chuck Norris during a hockey game. He roundhouse kicked Jason in the face so hard, he melded the goalie mask to his face, broke his vocal cords, and messed up his brain

How did Santa's reindeer learn how to fly? Chuck Norris ordered them to damn well better learn how.

When Chuck Norris goes to a strip club, the strippers pay him before their performances.