Chuck Norris can call checkmate, before the pieces are setup on the chessboard.

Have you ever wondered why Chuck Steaks are so tough. You guessed it.Chuck Norris.

A black hole is created every time Chuck Norris farts.

If you asked Chuck Norris how many houses he could build out the skulls of his enemies, he would ask you how many graveyards there are in the world.

At the end of a rainbow there is no pot of gold, it's Chuck Norris' cornhole.

The 1972 Miami Dolphins lost one game, it was a game vs. Chuck Norris and three seven year old girls. Chuck Norris won with a roundhouse-kick to the face in overtime.

When life throws lemons at chuck Norris, he catches them and throws them back at life.

Chuck Norris don't do facebook. No one can ever poke him.

As a teenager, Chuck Norris had a summer job. He was a lumberjack in the Sahara rainforest.

Chuck Norris makes "smart bombs" look like a bunch of knuckleheads.

Chuck Norris beat Mark Spitz's Olympic and world record 200 meter butterfy time by swimming through the WAL*MART concrete parking lot while chained to two dead bull elephants and a pregnant rhino.

Chuck Norris shoved a Saint Bernard up Richard Gere's ass.

Brick shithouses are built like Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is the best in the West. He also has the North, East and South totally covered.

The reason why Barack Obama hasn't came out and said he is a muslim is because Chuck Norris is still alive

Jehovah is the Hebrew word for Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris doesn't text message with him fingers. He uses his nose.

Chuck Norris invented Nunchucks after he defeated 100 Evil Nuns with two wooden rulers tied together.

Chuck Norris dosen't sing in the rain. Chuck Norris sings in Category 5 tornado and hurricanes.

Chuck Norris can cut a knife with butter