When Chuck Norris played Starcraft 2, he won a match in 1 minute because his fingers make 1000 moves in 20 seconds.

Once, after chugging a gallon of Captain Morgan Rum, Chuck Norris french kissed a transexual frog. Nine month later, Chaz Bono was born.

Chuck Norris is Mysterion.

Chuck Norris went bungy jumping without a harness.

The last person smart-off to Chuck Norris found himself picking up his teeth with two broken arms and counting them with two black eyes.

When Chuck Norris is driving traffic lights never turn red

Chuck Norris once round house kicked a retarded kids bus, and it became the first smart car.

Chun kuk do- founded by Chuck Norris in 1990- is an amalgamation of Korean tang soo do, shotokan karate, subak, taekkyon, judo and Brazilian jiu-jitsu. In other words, it's the juice that powers his epic

Chuck Norris doesnt play by the rules. the rules play by Chuck Norris

God create the earth and all living things.... But Chuck Norris created God

Chuck Norris has five children whose names are: - Van Damme - Arnold Schwarzenegger - Clint Eastwood - Steven Seagal - Joe Pesci

Chuck Norris has enough bling to make Mr. T look Amish

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take sh** from anybody.

Chuck Norris could drop kick you thru the telephone on an international long distance call, reverse the charges and you would accept them.

Chuck norris was born in the year 1 AC...Anno Chuck

Chuck Norris was origionally to be cast as Neo in The Matrix, but when they told him about the powers he would recieve, he laughed and said im Chuck Norris! He then proceeded to roundhouse kick the Warner

one day a cop pulled Chuck Norris over for speeding, that cop was lucky to leave with a warning

Chuck Norris can have his cake, eat it, then roundhouse kick you in the face with the extra power it gave him.

Chuck norris can play a double-bass with his teeth.

How do you know when Chuck Norris has been in your house? You are now homeless. And, more often than not, dead.