Chuck Norris is so tough that he always bathes and showers in cold water.

Knock knock. Whos there? Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris who? Chuck Norris is gonna roundhouse kick ya in the FACE

Chuck Norris is my nigga

Chuck Norris Has Three Twins

Chuck Norris doesn't need garbage collection because he doesn't call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick().

Chuck Norris can eat a lemon with his eyes open

Chuck Norris has many a dead hooker in his basement.

Chuck Norris digests His Food In His Mouth.

Chuck Norris can pass an eye exam blind folded.

Chuck Norris once farted while he was in New Orleans which caused 300,000 lemmings to become suicidal cliff jumpers.

Most kids where superman pajamas. Superman, however, wears Chuck Norris pajamas

Orange Bird is both the smallest and largest bird in Angry Birds Theme 18-2. Chuck Norris has both the smallest and largest 8=D.

On his way to St. Ives, Chuck Norris killed a man with seven wives. He then fucked all seven wives and stomped a SHITLOAD of cats and kittens to death.

When Chuck Norris gives his song and dance, he sings Bad To The Bone while he dances on your face.

The one and only time Chuck Norris ever took a hit of LSD, he wrote the theme song to 'The Beverly Hillbillies".

Chuck Norris rocks a sweet beard of power.

Chuck Norris does not scream while riding rollercoasters, rollercoasters scream while being ridden by Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris once lovingly rubbed his beard across the face of a dying little girl in an attempt to reviver her. He succeeded in reviving her but his beard erased her entire face.

Staring at Chuck Norris for extended periods of time without proper eye protection will cause blindess, and possibly foot sized brusies on the face.

Chuck Norris can play Xbox Kinect games on his PlayStation4 and PlayStation Move games on his Xbox 720.