Chuck Norris can play skin banjo without using his hands.

Chuck Norris was originally cast in the hit film taken but he got his daughter back before the end of the opening scene

God stole Chuck Norris' job when he applied...God has been hiding ever since

Welcome to Chucknorrism. The site of Chuck Norris facts. Make a fact or you'll piss off Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris always puts a coaster under his Uzi.

Chuck Norris prefers to kill people in the key of D minor.

Chuck Norris refuses to dip his chips in sissy assed hummas. He prefers a pile of organic tree bark, dead feral hog & whiskey humus.

Chuck Norris once beat Pokemon Black and White. He hacked once, though this was so when he got a Pokemon, it immediately turned into a Metapod. None ever used Struggle.

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

Out of sheer boredom, Chuck Norris once stabbed an elephant to death, with a toothpick!

It was Chuck Norris who taught Mongo, of the "Blazing Saddles" movie fame, how to proerly light a cigar.

Chuck Norris gets 10 hours of sleep every night between midnight and 4 a.m.

Trick me once, shame on you, trick Chuck Norris.....rest in peace.

Chuck Norris can finish a fat Cuban cigar in a single massive drag. He will then crunch up and swallow the roach, and stare at you while slowly exhaling through his nostrils.

When the lord said let there be light, Chuck Norris said say please.

There is endless debate about the existence of the human soul. Well it does exist and Chuck Norris finds it delicious.

#YOLO (exception: Chuck Norris)

Chuck Norris once had an erection while laying face down.... he struck oil

MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips. Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.

Chuck Norris can speak japanese so fluently your ears will bleed.