My day got a lot more interesting today when I saw a number from across the country ringing on my phone. Could it be another scam number? Or was it that job I applied to a couple days ago? Is it possible that I may have a fresh, new opportunity to write full time and get paid to crate content?
Since I was young, I have played with the idea of "becoming a writer". I remember being invited to a special workshop as a child that was for children who excelled at the craft of writing. I remember the excitement and the feeling of accomplishment for earning that opportunity. As I got older, writing for a living seemed like a far away dream. For some reason, I'd built up a pedestal that couldn't be reached and somehow perched the dream of writing at the very top. Far above the reach of the young boy in my head, there sat my dream, completely unattainable.
For a season, I wrote scripts and poetry when I was in college, pursuing acting. As a young adult, the dream of writing grew once again, only to be pushed back down by the habit of relying on my physical talents and relentless work ethic in the things I pursue. So, it was, that I lost my way again. Forgetting a dream and a talent that once set my brain on fire with excitement and jubilation.
Enter 2021. The year of the Covid-19 Pandemic.
A friend of mine from college, who I regretfully spent less time getting to know than I would have liked to told me about this thing called Hive. "What the heck is Hive?" I'd asked. He told me a bunch of stuff I kind of understood and then I forgot about it for a bit and the gears got to turning. Why not spend a little bit of time and effort getting my feet wet, writing and creating for myself and see what comes of it. What's the worst that can happen? I decide I don't really want to participate in an anonymous, online community? So, it began.
I wrote one little thing and another and let things sit for a while, not paying much mind to this online community that now intrigues me greatly. Time would pass until I took some time to reflect on where I was and where I wanted to be. One who I was and who I wanted to be. That night of self reflection was a major turning point in my life and I still feel things shifting from the many realizations of that intentional time. I had been trying my best to live my life intentionally, but I had realized that I was not living my life on purpose and so I wrote.
Realizing that I wasn't a fully active participant in my life was a sobering and uncomfortable realization, It's never easy to realize that you're being lied to by your best friend, especially when that best friend is yourself. So, I did what any gentleman with a backbone would do and challenged myself to a duel. Not an easy task, as Edward Norton expertly demonstrated in the movie Fight Club! Although I didn't pummel myself physically, I took this realization as a well earned opportunity to have a honest discussion with myself about what my priorities in life were and the person I really wanted to be. I remember specifically, one question that changed my life forever, because it will challenge me till the day I die. "Why do I continue to ask for more talents if I've squandered the ones I've already been give?" I don't know what your beliefs are, but if there is a God that could do so, why would an all powerful deity grant gifts to someone who never put to use what they were given?
That night, I wrote through the night and into the early morning. Maybe it was guilt from the realization that I was squandering what could be shaped into what many others would sacrifice greatly to achieve, and maybe it was a whole lot of unprocessed words that had been blocked up for too long that needed to spill out. Either way, I had realized that, no matter what, I was going to embrace the many gifts that I have been blessed with. Whether it be something I profit from or not, I committed to living my life on purpose and using the abundant gifts that I've been blessed with and sharing them with others in hopes that they will do the same.
I don't know what will come of this opportunity yet. As I write this, I await an email from the company that is offering me an opportunity to smith words into stories for their many clients and their readers. I await a trial that may prove my worth that may, ultimately lead me to one of the greatest opportunities to hone my skills as a paid writer by finally chopping down that pedestal that I build as a child. Time will tell the tale and although their decision is yet to be made, mine is already defined by my belief. The belief in myself and the greater power that granted me the ability to turn words into thoughts and thoughts into pictures and feelings to evoke action. I'm excited to meet this opportunity with everything I have, without worry.
My mind is made up. I will become my truest and most authentic self through the expressions that I choose to pursue and I will forge my path in this world with the guidance of the gifts that I've been blessed with, because that is the will of the universe. And, although I am confident in my own personal strength of will and ability, I am but a speck of dust upon the doorstep of the universe. In that, I am the universe, itself and therefore, I can never fail as long as I never falter. This, I wholeheartedly believe to be true, honest and real.
To all you reading this, I wish you prosperity and abundance on your journey. Yes, the path is difficult, but nothing worth doing is easy, or so "they" say.
Much love, stay well and be kind to one another.
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