We all have a story to recall from school. A tell tale of humor or a romantic tale or even a time when you skipped school to do something uncalled for. Well I came from a school with a pretty conservative background. From all the expectations I had, hoping I would have a great adventurous "School Life", well it surpassed all of that. You are free to interpret anything.
So let's get down to business. A crush you had fantasized about in school, well you must be thinking now , yeah been there done that. Like most of you guys I had one too. On one account I was elated with excitement when he called me to chat in private. I was hoping man this would be the day he'd ask me out. He said " My best friend has a massive crush on you, would you go out with him?" didn't see that one coming. I was gravely disappointed, some of you would that man you should at least be flattered. Well not so much this was a half glass empty kinda situation for me.
His friend walks up to me and delivers his light hearted confession (in my perspective). I didn't know how to respond, I told him that I'd think about it. I felt bad that he might have felt an embarrassing rejection of a sort, but I didn't feel the need to mislead him (which by the way I think is one of the biggest crimes).
He tells me " hey, come on man, is there really so much to think? The thing is Valentine's day is just about the corner, so you guys gotta be together for just about a week and before you know it might as well be over." Well at this point I was bewildered, I was stunned. Two questions popped up in my head
What in the world does he even think of me? Moreover what does he even want.
I was only in ninth grade , n hey readers if you have read my introduction you would probably know of how I had an extremely sheltered upbringing. Well to keep it short I was pretty innocent.
I told him I didn't share the same feelings . He pleaded and "I told him OK". Was I out of my mind? Hell yeah, a moment later I told him that I was sorry and I didn't want to mislead him and that I just couldn't do it.
Well rejection was not his best forte, and well delivering it was probably not mine either. A couple of days later we had a small disagreement which kinda led me to call him a swine. Well that took a toll on me for the worst. A service I caught one of his friends doing him later was not what I could have ever imagine someone do. Written on a wall outside my school building was...
( Oh damn, just gave away my name, so much for my anonymity)
Hmmm now I wonder what you must be wondering reading this? The truth is the innocent me back then didn't even know what that meant, people looked at me n smiled. People I had never even made any eye contact with, n what the hell I smiled too. Suddenly I felt like the most popular girl in school. Need I add the guys I had the hots for were literally checking me out.
Sure, "slut" would have meant something? The truth is I got to know that a little later in the day when a friend of mine explained to me what it meant.
I was flustered with humiliation, slut shaming was something incredibly new to me. Slut shaming a virgin? hell that was something else entirely. People saw me in a new light, maybe even tainted with the colour red. I felt like the walking scarlet letter.
MY "best friend" started to question the credibility of my innocence. I never thought she could doubt me, but she just happened to be one of the many. If it wasn't for the only solid back bone I had in my life (my twin sister) I would have collapsed a long time ago with all these bullets firing at me.
Four years later my "best friend" told me that he was sorry, well how was I supposed to react to that (forgive him it's been four long years). I told her I'm sorry I just can't let it go so easy, I guess he hasn't walked through those halls in these shoes.
On hearing about this my twin sister prancing like a boxer on her two feet she stands ready till this very day, like she did back then to yell and shame him, and she's still waiting to give him a black eye and probably even kill him. Man I love her.
I still wonder to this day how an Indian conservative school based in Kerala took no action, and how it suddenly took on such a western culture.
I hope this blog didn't bore you. If you can relate please comment. I know this may not be all that relatable but I just wanted to put it out there.
That's all I guess you guys
Oh, n could you pardon the sketches if you feel they aren't that great. I wanted to simply brighten up this gloomy blog.
