My 1st post was short and kind of childish cuz I really didn't know where to start.
I didn't wanna start to heavy on you guys ;)
I still didn't decide how and with what so I'll just start writing what happened today and what makes me really anxious.
I had to visit my family doctor today. I had to but I didn't.
Now I don't have medicine until Monday afternoon when I will be able to go again, because of the weekend.
I have to go every week because I need to have the prescription for my pills, my poison. They will give it to me gladly, don't get me wrong. I just need to get there on time, earlier! ;)
Last time, last week I was there, I came 10 minutes before closing time but it was already closed and locked.
I was immediate in the panic mode and I started knocking on the door and window shadows next to it. I'm not even sure did I knock on the window shadows or not, but I was going to if nobody answers the door.
Nurs did, in a few seconds.
She was mad. Mad at me coming late.
I should have come earlier, she said.
At the same time, I was happy I manage to come altogether but I didn't tell her that. I was happy that I got my "poison" and I can go home with peace.
Today was my "D day", I call it, and I could not go.
I had a fiver, and I sent her two nasty emails. This is why I'm so anxious about.
They can't leave the prescription in the pharmacy next door because it's against the law. And if I can't come to pick it up, I'm without it.
On the other hand, I don't believe she is anxious about anything, especially anxious about me, and how they both behaved. Nurs and the doctor (also she).
If something happens to me cuz I didn't have this medication and I die, she would write my post-mortem, or mortuary in a blink of an eye with words like: " What the heck happened!? We didn't know. We knew nothing!" :p lol Dark humor.
..and I'm their patient for cca 7 years! At least. And they have a chance to see me every week. So its hard for them to tell something like "I didn't know". Cuz she should have known. She is my family doctor for God sake! I'm sorry, but this just makes me so mad.
They could see that my health was falling. They really might have if they really wanted to. They should change their behavior and practise. But they will not and they will not if they are not forced to do so, and if someone do not punish them for their misdeeds.
They had a chance to see me every week for last cca 7 years. To see how I fall apart, how my health is worse and wors.. Why would I even bother going there sick, with high temperature risking to come to see closed, locked doors?! They don't really treat ppl, cure them. They just medicate them.
The point is they expect from sick ppl to behave like healthy ones. They find things that could patients do, to fight the system (badly) or for example to come earlier but won't take responsibility for their own actions, or better lack of action, their negligence and no empathy.
And they swore to "do no harm" but they did harm.
I know they harmed me. Many times.
They won't be punished cuz everything is under the law, but it isn't in the spirit of the law and they keep getting forgetting that fact.
Now I think I'm in trouble. Cuz those nasty two emails.
Have I said it yet!? Have I already said!? I'm from fricking Balkan, folks!
