And oh boy, are we so glad you did come here.
Hilarious, the way you write; some are real masterpieces. And I know a lot here say the same.

Just one example: I try to go to the gym at least twice a week. And since that post you did a couple of months ago about you back in the gym, I get a big smile on my face everytime entering the joint myself now.
'I was home' and that marvelous twist at the end ... 'No seed for you tonight'
Classic!