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simianAmber
@simianamber
34
An art form called Descriptive Art, made to exist only in the mind of the reader, the piece is completed in the readers imagination. All work © simianAmber
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London
Created
2017-08-31 10:10
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Wallet
simianamber
writers
8y
Time heals all wounds
Install a fountain in a gallery, it can be a copy of the Trevi in Rome, or a super slick gloss white modernist thing, anything you like. Steadily increase the salinity of the water, over a period of several
$ 0.000
1
simianamber
writers
8y
Land of hope and glory
Stand twenty FOBT’s in the middle of a gallery room, in a circle, casino style. Surround them with thousands of screwed up lottery tickets and used scratch cards.
$ 0.000
0
simianamber
writers
8y
Logical conclusion
Mock up some ‘celebrity lifestyle’ magazine covers, display them in a row on a gallery wall. Vomit – pictures of celebrities puking their guts up. Wank – pictures of celebrities wanking. Fuck – pictures
simianamber
writers
8y
Race
For every negative, publish a positive.
simianamber
writers
8y
Public convenience
Install a phonebox in the corner of a gallery room.
simianamber
writers
8y
Have a conversation on the telephone
Install a payphone in a gallery. Connect it directly to one somewhere else.
simianamber
writers
8y
Its only art but I like it
Dig a grave in the centre of a gallery room, leave the spoil to one side. Lower a white porcelain urinal into the grave. Every visitor must throw a handful of dirt into the grave. The piece is finished
simianamber
writers
8y
Hypermegaultragigaterralopolis
Build a self powered autonomous 3D printer. Have it print models of cities at 1:50 scale using Google Earth as it’s input, laying them behind it in a never ending trail of architectural models.
simianamber
writers
8y
Another explosion in a paint factory
Lay out 100 2.5ltr cans of paint in a 10x10 grid. Choose 100 different colours…or 2…38…whatever you like. Surround the grid with 4 canvasses, about 3m long by 2.1m high. Lower 100 hand grenades into the
simianamber
writers
8y
Clothes horse
Take any high end fashion retailer you like… Replace the price tags on their clothes with one showing how much the person who made the piece got paid for it.
simianamber
writers
8y
Nothing in common
Place three galvanized steel buckets against a gallery room wall, about 50mm apart. Fill one with piss, one with shit, one with blood.
simianamber
writers
8y
Hope I die before they get old
An installation for the Guggenheim in NYC. Build a continuous soft play adventure complex from the bottom to the top. Open it for free over a holiday weekend. Amplify the sound across NYC.
simianamber
writers
8y
Change of function
Make an exact copy of the vitrine Damien Hirst used for his ‘The Physical Impossibility of Death in the Mind of Someone Living’ piece. Put a live tiger shark in it, same size as the dead one used in the
simianamber
writers
8y
Let it snow
Fit snow machines into the roof space of the Turbine Hall at Tate Modern, set up to create a steady snowfall across the entire space. Simultaneously, use space heaters at ground level to heat the space
simianamber
writers
8y
Hybridmaster
Find a herd of Hybridmaster cattle grazing in a field somewhere. Using a stencil, label each animal - BEEF PRODUCT
simianamber
writers
8y
Caffeine+ sugar
Rename the energy drinks aisle in your local supermarket.
simianamber
writers
8y
Little slices of death
A merchandising tie-in for Very slow death. Take a 1mm slice through the length of a smokers lung, and the same from a healthy one. Take a hi-res image of each, laying on a lightbox, then pair them up
simianamber
writers
8y
Very slow death
Suspend a pair of deceased smokers lungs in a circular glass tank full of solvent. Stand the tank on a cylindrical white stone plinth, around 1.5m high. Light the tank from below. Slowly, the tar in the
simianamber
death
8y
Death and taxes
Create the worlds most valuable object, in the form of a sarcophagus cast in platinum, with intricate iridium inlay. Fill it to overflowing with uncut blood diamonds. Stand it in the middle of a gallery
simianamber
writers
8y
The last temptation
Stretch a wire across a gallery room at 1.8m high. It will come straight out of the walls either side, with no visible fixings. At the entrance to the room will be a sign explaining that a lethal voltage
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