The Blame Game: Ever been caught up in it? Even now I'm tempted to blame someone or something for not posting for the last 3 days. But I resisted. I know it's because I just put other things first. So when did I learn a lesson on blaming? I remember the day very well - just like it was yesterday but in fact it was back in 1987. I know you must be impressed with my great memory - haha!
At the time, I had been operating my own business for about 3 years and had hired a 'consultant' to help me with marketing. We were sitting on my couch in my living room discussing ways I could improve on growing the business. In our discussion, she said something like "While we're being honest here, there is something I need to tell you and you're probably not going to like it." And boy was she right!!
I had 7 employees and she had been spending considerable time at the shop and had heard lots of discussions around situations where I was unhappy with something that had happened (or hadn't happened). Her point was to let me know that I had a bad habit of "always looking for someone to blame" for the problem. She shared a number of examples and said this habit did nothing to enhance employee relations or employee loyalty. Matter of fact, they were ALWAYS afraid and reticent to tell me when there was a problem, knowing they would likely be the first to be BLAMED.
She said I must realize that the most important thing I needed to do was to openly ask for input as to how WE could make sure this situation didn't happen again in the future and to refrain from the BLAME GAME.
I must admit, I wasn't very pleased with the discussion, however, after she left and I cooled off and took the time to seriously consider the advice, I had to admit - she was right. I wish I could say I never, ever fell into the BLAME GAME trap again, but that would be untrue. However, it happened far less often and I would say - today, I am almost cured.
I was reminded of this lesson - why - because I have a dear friend who I need to talk to about this very issue. She is a wonderful lady, but she is an habitual blamer. Mostly she blames her husband but he is not the only one. Sometime soon, we will sit on a couch in her lovely living room and I will share this story with her.
If you have ever fallen into this pit of BLAME, I hope this lesson will help you reflect on how you can change. Or, maybe you know of someone (like I do) who you can share this lesson with, who needs a word of advice.
Blessings to you. See you again soon.
